Writers of Pro Football Prospectus 2008

16 Jul 2005

Man Flagged by Police for Impersonating Steeler QBs

This guy is also available for birthdays, bar mitzvahs, and weddings. The funniest thing to come out of this story is that Brian Jackson, the impersonator, was actually able to get a date by pretending to be the Steelers third string QB, Brian St. Pierre. The second funniest thing to come out of this was that Jackson ruined a perfectly good Roethlisberger jersey by signing it.

Posted by: P. Ryan Wilson on 16 Jul 2005

26 comments, Last at 26 Aug 2006, 12:43am by Kyle

Comments

1
by Ron Mexico (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 12:33am

That is so messed up. What was that guy thinking?

2
by Marc (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 1:35am

Click my name for a version of this article with a picture of the guy. Any female here in Wisconsin would immediately realize that a guy that looked like that wasn't a QB.

3
by Brian St. Pierre (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 2:01am

Someday, I'll tell my grandchildren that I was once famous enough that someone landed a date by pretending to be me.

4
by Glenn (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 3:13am

No, the funniest line from the story was:

Jackson (pretending to be St. Pierre) also told the woman to watch Steelers games so she could see him when he went into the game, police said.

Yup, just wait for the game when Roethlisberger and Maddox each get hit by random lightning strikes. Or maybe the one where they chow down the same bad fish fed to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Peter Graves.

5
by Ron Mexico (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 10:25am

I'll admit it guys. It was me.

And who's that guy a few posts up pretending to be me?

6
by princeton73 (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 1:38pm

When the woman did watch a Steelers game, she saw the real Brian St. Pierre on the screen and realized that Jackson was an impostor, police said. Jackson tried to explain to the woman that he looked "different" on TV,

you know how TV always makes you look 10 pound heavier

by the way, what's the cut-off point for lies to a prospective date that makes it a crime?

you can tell a woman you're rich & successful

you can tell a woman that you have huge, ummm, tracts of land

you can tell a woman you're intelligent

but you can't tell a woman that you're Brian St. Pierre?

why not--that seems a lot more harmless lie than the first 3

7
by Trogdor (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 2:23pm

From the article, it appears that what he did (lying about his athletic skillz) isn't the illegal part, but what came after he was found out, and what he did to perpetuate the ruse.

"Jackson, arrested Friday, was charged with harassment for allegedly continuing to contact both women after they learned of the ruses. He was also charged with criminal mischief for allegedly ruining a Steelers jersey owned by one of the women's neighbors when he signed his worthless rendition of Roethlisberger's autograph on it."

8
by bravehoptoad (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 4:17pm

Sure, lying itself ain't illegal. It's any damages caused by the lie that could be criminal, and in this case, what's the damage? Well, he ruined a good shirt, that's what.

9
by Stiller Fan in Cle (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 4:20pm

Between this and the dead guy, the press are portraying Steeler fans in quite a wonderful light...

Anyway, I think that the women were rather gullible for falling for "I'm Brian St. Pierre, a famous athlete" They're REALLY gullible if the "athlete" pulled up in a beaten Honda Civic or something...

10
by Balaji (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 5:28pm

Memo to some Steelers fans (you know who you are):

Please stop making us look like jackassses. Thank you.

11
by Theo (not verified) :: Sat, 07/16/2005 - 9:24pm

says a lot 'bout those women... but who knows Brian St. Piere anyway?

12
by Aaron (not verified) :: Sun, 07/17/2005 - 12:10am

Pierre, as we all know, is the patron saint of the kneeldown.

13
by Stiller Fan in Cle (not verified) :: Sun, 07/17/2005 - 1:46am

I was just thinking, I wonder if the jersey, paired with a newspaper clipping or two documenting the event, would actually be worth more than a mint Roethlisberger jersey (think ebay)...

In that case, the suit for damages would be silly (as if this whole thing already wasn't)

14
by jburstein (not verified) :: Sun, 07/17/2005 - 6:58am

I would say the women are definitely stupid. Especially the one who fell for the Roethlisberger stunt. Who owns a Roethlisberger jersey and can't recognize the guy??

I mean I know the Pittsburgh media NEVER print pictures of the guy or anything. And he's NEVER on TV. So I guess I could understand...oh wait. Nevermind.

As for the cars...I think I read an article somewhere saying that Heinz Ward drives a Kia Rio or something like that.

-Justin

15
by Trogdor (not verified) :: Sun, 07/17/2005 - 11:43am

I don't think this whole thing is silly. He lied to some woman, she found out about it and dumped him, he keeps calling and harassing her, she calls the police and they arrest him for harassment. The only silly thing is the nature of his lies, otherwise it's a straightforward harassment (or potentially stalking) case. What's silly about not wanting to be harassed?

16
by Stiller Fan in Cle (not verified) :: Sun, 07/17/2005 - 3:38pm

There's nothing silly about harassment, but this guy doesn't seem very malevolent or anything like that... Also, from the tone of the article, it does sound like he disappeared pretty quickly after the incident...

I guess more than anything else it just seems silly compared to all the really harmful stuff that seems to come up...

17
by Pat on the Back (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 12:16pm

That guy would have had much better luck looking up someone on the practice squad. I know that works for me.

18
by White Rose Duelist (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 1:56pm

One of my exes claimed to be related to Mike Quinn when he was deep on the Steelers' QB depth chart behind the immortals Mike Tomczak and Slash Stewarts. I guess there's something sexy about having thrown a single incomplete pass in the NFL.

Of course, she previously claimed to be related to Patricia Quinn ( of Rocky Horror fame), so I was skeptical.

19
by Carl (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 2:19pm

The only reason he was caught was because the lady's neighbor saw the faux Roethlisberger riding a motorcycle WITH his helmet on.

Doh!

20
by Scott de B. (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 5:07pm

Of course, she previously claimed to be related to Patricia Quinn ( of Rocky Horror fame), so I was skeptical. .

And then she claimed to be related to Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman....

21
by dryheat (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 5:10pm

The guy screwed up by impersonating a footballer. That's why I stick to hockey. Say hello to Bryan Smolinski.

22
by Richie (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 6:59pm

Chicks prefer hockey players anyway.

23
by Jeff (not verified) :: Mon, 07/18/2005 - 9:54pm

What's the big deal? Kordell Stewart impersonated a Steeler's QB for years!

24
by White Rose Duelist (not verified) :: Tue, 07/19/2005 - 11:10am

With the amount of makeup she wore, I might be inclined to believe she was related to Harley Quinn.

25
by Rick "32_Footsteps" Healey (not verified) :: Tue, 07/19/2005 - 1:03pm

Wait, the inevitable Kordell reference wasn't made until the 23rd post. That's one bet I lost.

Actually, I'm wondering if the guy tried to do anything beyond landing dates with fake names - I know quite a few NFL players have been victims of identity theft.

26
by Kyle (not verified) :: Sat, 08/26/2006 - 12:43am

Now the dummy is in trouble AGAIN, this time for pretending to be Jerame Tuman....oh God...will this yokel EVER learn?