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06 Dec 2007

The Week in Quotes: December 6, 2007

compiled by Ben Riley

IS MIKE TOMLIN A NUTCASE? NO, HE'S A ROCK BITER.

"The fact that they are undefeated is their story, not our story."

-- Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin, describing the upcoming game between the Steelers and the Patriots

"Whether or not they had close calls, again, is their story, not our story."

-- Tomlin

"Our story is that we play them this weekend."

-- Tomlin

"We are going play our game. We don't let people dictate to us how we play defense. But we've got to play our game and play it well. We acknowledge that. This week is not unlike any other week. If we play at a high level, we've got a chance to win; if we play poorly, we've got a chance to lose."

-- Tomlin

"They formulated a plan and they had a level of success with it, but not enough to win. We will formulate our plan. We will use some things people have done in the past potentially to formulate our plan, but ultimately, it has to be us and we will move forward and see what happens this weekend."

-- Tomlin, describing the relative success of the Eagles and Ravens in stopping New England's offense

"It is awesome. I get the feeling I used to get when we used to prepare for the Rams when they were 'The Greatest Show on Turf' or when we had to prepare for Minnesota when I first broke in and they had Cris Carter and Randy Moss. You love those games. If you are a competitor, you do. I believe we have a bunch of competitors here."

-- Tomlin (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)

WAIT, IT'S THE NEVERENDING TOMLIN!

"He's been getting some extra work while trying to control his weight as the season wears on. To my knowledge, at this point, it might be a product of getting too much time on the elliptical cycle."

-- Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin (again!), describing the rehabilitation regime of oft-injured running back Najeh Davenport

"Be careful as you get your workout in. The elliptical cycle will get you."

-- Tomlin

"I've heard that theory, but commentators need something to talk about throughout the course of the football game."

-- Tomlin, when asked about John Madden's criticism of the rubber sleeves worn by Willie Parker during Monday night's Bengals-Steelers contest. Parker fumbled four times.

"The reality is that with that being excuse-making, we aren't going to make them."

-- Tomlin

"Those guys have a variety of supplemental equipment they use. Sometimes they feel like they need it. Sometimes it's a fashion statement. I was the same way when I was a young guy trying to play football."

-- Tomlin

"Willie is a professional and I trust that he will do what is required for him to be successful. I will ask him to hold on to the football in the future."

-- Tomlin (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)

GENTLE BOB?

"My hands were sweating."

-- Jack Combs, age 10, describing the sensation of meeting Colts safety Bob Sanders. Combs, who attends Brown Elementary School, recently won the NFL's "Take a Player to School" contest.

"I didn't know what to think of him. But he's a really nice, gentle guy."

-- Combs, offering a surprising assessment of Sanders

"That's awesome, man."

-- Bob Sanders, reacting to being described as "gentle"

"When I first got to college, I didn't know I could hit that hard."

-- Sanders, talking to Combs and his classmates about the pleasure he derives from violence

"A lot."

-- Sanders, when asked how much he could bench press

"I'm actually 5-8 1/2. People don't know, but that half-inch means a lot to me."

-- Sanders, when asked about his height

"It's going to be pretty cool. I'll be able to say, 'Hey, I know that guy. He's one of my new friends.'"

-- Combs, when asked what it would be like to watch Colts games from now on.

"This is the best day of my life."

-- Combs (Indianapolis Star)

DEREK FROM CINCINNATI

"We'd get a bucket of chicken, go out and just surf until it got dark usually."

-- Jaguars rookie defensive back Derek Landri, describing his experiences surfing with his dad while growing up in Long Beach, California

"I went to Notre Dame and kind of stopped [surfing]. There's no ocean out there."

-- Landri

"I'm a year older than him, and I was on varsity when I first saw him. When you're on varsity, you always go out and watch the junior varsity games. So he was up on junior varsity as a freshman, and I got to see him play before I met him. I was like, 'That little guy can move.'"

-- Landri, describing his first impression of Maurice Jones-Drew. Landri played with Jones-Drew at De La Salle High School in Concord, California. (Florida Times-Union)

KEEP CHOPPING BARK

"[Colts defensive line coach John Teerlinck] does a great job of getting his guys to bark and flinch and draw people offside."

-- Jaguars head coach Jack Del Rio, complaining about the Colts' coaching tactics after the Jaguars lost to the Colts last Sunday

"We tried to educate the officials about it and we didn't quite get that communicated well enough to slow them down ... Guys in my position get fined for saying what they think about those things. I'll let you say what you saw."

-- Del Rio (Orlando Sentinel)

"That was a curious comment to me because they're going with a silent count and they're trying to time it off the center's head, and when you're not using the [hard] count I'm not sure what happens that causes [penalties]."

-- Colts head coach Tony Dungy

"I just don't know where that came from."

-- Dungy (Indianapolis Star)

SPICER IT UP

"A GM with a radio show. You're kidding me. Give me a break. Ridiculous.''

-- Jaguars defensive end Paul Spicer, mocking Colts general manger Bill Polian

"We could have done more, but there were some things going on out there that were definitely against us. I don't have to say it. You know what it is. You watched the game. We felt we had a good crew. They're the worst."

-- Spicer, criticizing the officiating in the Jaguars-Colts game (admittedly in somewhat bizarre fashion)

"I bet people at home were wondering what is going on out there. I'm ticked off right now.''

-- Spicer (Florida Times-Union)

WE STILL LOVE YOU, LEIGH, BUT FOR ROMEO'S SAKE -- DON'T KICK THE BALL!

"If [Browns defensive back Leigh Bodden] didn't know kicking the ball was a penalty, then why don't a lot of people kick the balls? You can't kick the ball unless you're a kicker lining up to kick an extra point or on a kickoff. You don't kick the ball."

-- Browns head coach Romeo Crennel, halfheartedly blaming himself for Bodden's decision to boot a dead ball after the Browns stopped the Cardinals on third down. The resulting delay of game penalty led to a Cardinals touchdown, and the Browns ended up losing the game. (Cleveland Plain Dealer)

JON ALMIGHTY

"Our boat's not very full, I know that. We don't have a lot of people left in our boat right now."

-- Lions quarterback Jon Kitna, describing the depressed atmosphere within the Lions locker room after falling to 6-6

"I'm talking about us in general. We are not heading in the same direction right now, as a football team."

-- Kitna (NFL.com)

THE WEEK IN HERM

"People always question when you have a record like this."

-- Herm Edwards, describing the Chiefs' 4-8 record

"Your record makes a difference of whether you're going to be in the playoffs..."

-- Herm (to be fair, he finished the quote with "but what people miss the point of is the preparation that you put in, regardless of your record, every week to try to win a game.")

"That's what this thing is all about, it's about preparing every week trying to win a game."

-- Herm

"Anytime you have the ability to compete and win a game, that's the fun of trying to win. And we need a win."

-- Herm

"The enjoyment of winning is a wonderful feeling."

-- Herm

"You only get to play 16. There's this other season called the playoffs ... but that's what you try to do."

-- Herm (Kansas City Star)

21

"This summer, I was in a mall buying my wife a birthday gift. And I saw Sean. He didn't see me, but I saw him, in the play area at the mall with his daughter, Jackie. They were just playing. He was having a great time; you could just tell. And no one was bothering him. I didn't say anything, because I didn't want to disturb him. It was just a nice moment, Sean playing with his daughter. That's what I'll remember."

-- Redskins representative Chris Helein, reflecting on the death of Redskins safety Sean Taylor (Sports Illustrated)

Remember to send your quotes to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com, just like Bruno Pucheu, Israel P., did this week.

Posted by: Ben Riley on 06 Dec 2007

66 comments, Last at 08 Dec 2007, 12:24am by pearl jam

Comments

1
by Bobman (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 6:45am

That was pretty mild Paul Spicer stuff. Nothing about Polian "putting a little extra in (the refs') pay envelopes"? Usually when I am feeling that batshit crazy, I throw a ref's flag into the stands, rather than accuse a GM of bribery, and the refs of accepting bribes. Or I guarantee a win over the Pats.

Oh, and 1st!

2
by andy (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 7:16am

geez, that last quote by the redskins office official almost made me cry. sean taylor's death has got to be one of the saddest things. i mean, marquis hill, darrent williams, and damien nash, their deaths are all sad too - marquis and darrent especially b/c i watched marquis play at lsu and darrent when he was playing opposite of champ bailey. but something about sean taylor's death is even sadder. maybe it's the whole thing about him turning his life around with the birth of his daughter. jesus, what a world we live in.

3
by cd6 via blackberry, from india (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 9:14am

I'n willing to guarentee a win over the patriots. We're going to destroy them so completely that Goodell will be forced to contract them out of the league to prevent further humiliation to the NFL, as the patriot players will be so emotionally devastated from their 350 point loss at the hands of the mighty steelers that tom brady and pals will forget how to play football without wetting their pants.

HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO

4
by Ch V Kalyan (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 10:08am

Cd6 - When you wake up from your dreams, you will feel a moment of pleasure and then reality will set in as you see the score NE 38 PIT 7

5
by JMM (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 10:23am

"Rock Biter?"

How about:
"We are a tired football team right now."
Bill Belichick

6
by Purds (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 10:45am

Where is the "guaranteed win" quote from the Steelers?

(The Patriots' winning ways over the last 6 years leads to all sorts of weird "truths" by some fans/media types. In the Globe, a columnist asks, "Don't they ever learn" not to give the Pats bulletin board material? The supposition being that NE wins BECAUSE of the foolish talking by opponents. My logic: I take more than 10 craps on the toilet every week, and the Patriots win every week. My bowel movements MUST be the reason. Couldn't be that NE is just good, regardless of my craps (or opponents giving BB material), so this week I am limiting myself to 9 trips!)

7
by joepinion (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 11:34am

We're going to win. Yeah, I can guarantee a win. Now we have our swagger back on defense and we're playing great ball and [our offense is] playing great on the offensive side, too. I think we have a real good chance to win the game and we will win the game... I think we were facing great receivers last week too and we shut them down. Those three guys, I don't think it gets much better than Cincinnati's corps of receivers. We've already seen the best. They said Baltimore was their most physical game but I think we hit harder than Baltimore, so they haven't seen nothing like us yet. They should be worried about us. We never worry about receivers. We're the ones doing the hitting. They have to run routes. We're attacking them, they're not really attacking us.

--Steelers free safety Anthony Smith (link in name)

8
by slo-mo-joe (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 12:10pm

Purds:
Just be a man and do the real experiment: hold it for the rest of the week, and see what happens. You may feel a bit queasy, but regardless of the game's outcome you will feel good about doing your part to balance the crap avalanche that is coming from the Steelers fan base and their bench-warmers.

9
by DrObviousSo (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 12:18pm

Just for those interested, the rumor going around Davenport is that he injured himself in a fight in a dance club in the strip (not a strip club, 'The Strip' is the place where all the clubs are in Pittsburgh). Recently, the Steelers have released an announcement that he injured himself getting unsupervised acupuncture. None of those three options are very flattering.

Also, when did this turn into a homer board for the Steelers. We all know this is a Patriot's homer board, he said only half jokingly.

10
by JCRODRIGUEZ (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 12:20pm

"The elliptical cycle will get you"...awesome!!!...I Love My Coach, that one is great!...oh, and regarding the guarantee thing, well, sometimes is good that somebody actually speaks its mind instead of goofing around with the over the counter answers...hopefully it will be a game as good as MNF...enjoy

11
by DrObviousSo (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 12:21pm

"John Madden has a lot of knowledge about the game but a Hall of Famer once told me use those rubber [sleeves] when it gets wet, and I've been using them ever since," Parker said. "No one complains when I'm out there carrying the ball 20, 30 times and not fumbling. It was just a bad game. I was the cause of the fumbles, not those rubber gloves."

Still, he said he will cast them aside no matter what the weather this Sunday in Foxborough, Mass. He said a boy asked him for his autograph Tuesday and then suggested he not "wear those things on your arm" anymore.

"I gave him my word I'm not going to wear them," Parker said. "That's the only reason I'm not going to wear them."
Willie Parker.

12
by Will Allen (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 12:43pm

It's really awful that Darrent Williams' murderer still hasn't been apprehended. Having a loved one murdered has to be among the most painful events one can endure, and it only can be magnified with the knowledge that the murderer has been able to go on about with his life nearly unchanged, as if the murdered loved one's life was insignificant. Maybe there are high minded people who could avoid having it gnaw at them endlessly, until they were nearly destroyed themselves, but I don't think I'm one of them.

13
by Stuart Fraser (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 1:17pm

9 - as JJ Cooper at AOL Fanhouse has pointed out, it's a bit odd to get a swollen foot as a result of a bar fight.

14
by Jimmy (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 1:33pm

I was flicking between the Jags/Colts game and another last Sunday and the Colts defensive tackles were taking it in turns to flinch as the snap approached. As far as I am aware you aren't allowed to do that, but they were and the officials did nothing. If it is allowed then fine, but I don't think it is and the officials should have thrown flags, but didn't.

15
by slo-mo-joe (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 1:46pm

#11:
If the weather is dry, I think it may be a mistake for Parker not to wear his elbow-condoms.

16
by Rich Conley (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 1:56pm

no racing snail?

17
by Greg (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 1:58pm

#14 - Defense can move as much as they want, so long as they don't cross into the neutral zone before the snap.

18
by Papa Narb (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:02pm

Doesn't it strike anyone else as a bit crazy that Parker is not going to wear his sleeves because of what a fan told him? And that his coaching staff is agnostic to his decisions on this?

19
by billsfan (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:05pm

"Demarcus Ware: what a tool," was said by one of the NFL Network commentators on Thursday.

20
by MJK (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:25pm

#14 - Defense can move as much as they want, so long as they don’t cross into the neutral zone before the snap.

That's what I thought too, until I saw a Patriot defender (Bruschi, I think?) get penalized for "Acting as if there had been a false start" earlier this season...

Anyone know the clear rule on this?

21
by Chris Owen (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:36pm

#18:

I do believe that was Collinsworth gushing over Ware's versatility; I got a chuckle out of his choice of words as well.

22
by FullmoonoverTulsa (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:46pm

Taking a shot at a GM for having a radio show is solid.

23
by SomeDude (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:56pm

19: "No player of the defensive team within one yard of the line of scrimmage may make an abrupt movement in an attempt to cause the offense to false start."Link in name.

24
by doktarr (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 2:57pm

RE Purds #6,

That may be the best "correlation does not imply causation" rant that I have ever heard. It narrowly beats out "I have a rock, I am not attacked by Tigers, therefore this rock protects me from tigers."

25
by mmm... sacrilicious (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:07pm

Re: Willie Parker's elbow condoms

Didn't Ahman Green used to have a fumbling problem that was caused by wearing rubber sleeves, too? I seem to remember that once he got rid of the rubber sleeves, his fumbling went away.

26
by Papa Narb (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:10pm

Re: #24

I think Tiki Barber did also.

27
by Rich Conley (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:12pm

26

Tiki Barber's fumbling problem was cured by changing the position of the ball. It had nothing to do with sleeves.

28
by mmm... sacrilicious (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:14pm

Update to #24...

The second blurb on this page, from 2004, suggests that Green ditched his protective sleeves to mitigate his fumbling problem:

Ahman Green in 2001

Ahman Green in 2007

Comment edited by moderator to hide really long, ugly links.

29
by Spenserhawk (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:28pm

Re: 24 and 25

Yes, Ahman did use the "elbow condoms" up until 2003, I think. I remember they played the Eagles in the rain and I think he fumbled twice and I don't remember him ever wearing them after that.

30
by Father of Four (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 3:53pm

"elbow condoms" don't work. trust me.

31
by Athelas (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:08pm

OK- #28 wins!

32
by RowdyRoddyPiper (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:11pm

Just a quick fact, the term rockbiter is also slang for someone with jacked up teefs. I haven't studied Tomlin's dental records but he doesn't seem to have anything obviously wrong with his teeth. Since I'm guessing it's a never ending story reference and am totally missing something, can someone please elucidate?

Also I sincerely wish that Anthony Smith would have taken some sports journo classes at Syracuse (I understand they have a good program!). That way he'd realize that no matter what you say, other players will hear it. All I can say is running your mouth like that you better de-cleat someone to back it up. I also think the Patriots will play at a high level regardless of what any Steeler's player says, but there's no point in wasting your time talking to reporters when you could be studying film.

33
by Jimmy (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:35pm

If what Somedude at #22 has quoted is true then the refs should have been penalising them for it. They were doing full body shudders, timed to fall line with the QB's cadence. If that rule is still in force the Colts were abusing it Sunday.

34
by mactbone (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:44pm

Re 25:
Tiki's fumbling stopped when he started carrying the ball up in his chest. If you saw him the past couple years you'd notice he would have one point aiming somewhere around his head and the opposite shoulder and the other in the crook of his elbow.

35
by mactbone (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:47pm

Re 31:
Meant to address this. The rule is usually only applied if an o-lineman moves as a result of the action or it's an incredibly blatant trick to get them to move. The only times I've seen it called on a defensive player without an o-lineman moving is when a LBer runs up to the line and flinches at them.

36
by Blind Steeler Nation (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:53pm

17. If the Steelers say that's the way it is, then that's the way it is. Just like a foot swelling due by unsupervised accupuncture. They don't lie like the Patriots.

Signed

37
by Israel (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:53pm

All I can say is running your mouth like that you better de-cleat someone to back it up.

Anthony Smith can be depended on for a couple of decleats every game. Some before the whistle, some after. Either way, the receivers remember them.

38
by TED F!@#ING GINN!? (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:54pm

Protects you from tigers, eh?

Doktarr, I want to buy your rock.

39
by Marcumzilla (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 4:57pm

RE #26 - How much would it take for you to sell me that rock?

40
by Diane (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:12pm

[23]

Who said that? Calvin (of Calvin and Hobbes fame)?

41
by Joe T. (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:17pm

#32 - i get the impression that RB coaches don't teach how to carry the ball regularly. Ladell Betts scares the hell out of me every time he carries.

42
by DrObviousSo (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:18pm

Interesting thing about the elbow condoms is that Parker claims Bettis got him to wear them. I though I recalled that Bettis was a very secure runner, and I know he wore them for most, if not all of his career.

I pulled some stats, and quickly calculated how many rushing attempts/fumble some RB's had. This is what I got:

Parker: 909 attempts / 15 fumbles = 60.6 att/fumble
Bettis: 3479 attempts / 37 fumbles = 94.0 att/fumble

Ahman Green (carrer): 1941 attempts / 35 fumbles = 55.5 att/fumble
AG (Pre 2003): 914 attempts / 16 fumbles = 57.1 att/fumble
AG (2003+) 1063 attempts / 19 fumbles = 55.9 att/fumble

Larry Johnson: 1050 attempts / 8 fumbles = 131.3 att/fumble
Marion Barber: 435 attempts / 4 fumbles = 108.75 att/fumble
LDT: 2289 attempts / 24 fumbles = 95.3 att/fumble
Sean Alexander: 2138 attempts / 29 fumbles = 73.7 att/fumble
Edge: 2770 attempts / 40 fumbles = 69.3 att/fumble
Chester Taylor: 804 attempts / 12 fumbles = 67 att/fumble
Jamal Lewis: 2019 attempts / 37 fumbles = 54.6 att/fumble
Ronnie Brown: 567 attempts / 8 fumbles = 45.8 att/fumble

1)Bettis had a fairly high att/fumble ratio wearing the elbow condoms.
2)If that was the year AG took them off, it doesn't look like they had much of an impact.
3)Parker's 60 att/fumble ratio isn't particularly good, it's not out of line with some other starting RB's
4)Is it just me, or does att/fumble look like a pretty useful quick and dirty metric for guaging RB's? Is this already known?

43
by slo-mo-joe (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:30pm

#39:
To be fair, I think that aside from the few basics, a lot of the subtle rules for carrying the ball are empirical, and may well vary significantly for different RB's depending on their physical attributes (hand size and strength, forearm length, etc) as well as running styles ("low" vs "high" runners, typical chest and shoulder angle, power vs agility, etc). Trial-and-error may be more of a factor there than, say, the mechanics of ball-throwing.

44
by MJK (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:43pm

You know, we criticize Rb's who are known for fumbling, but I'm actually pretty amazed that there are as few fumbles as there are. I know I'm not exactly an NFL-worthy physical specimen, but I'm pretty sure I couldn't hold onto a hard, oblate object while 1-3 250+ lb men did their best to rip it out of my grasp, especially if they're simultaneously slamming into me at the same time.

45
by Jonathan (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:54pm

I am LOVING the Neverending Story reference...."Atreyu!!!"
That movie, combined with Labyrinth and Willow, is about as closed to tripping without acid as you could get as an '80's kid
Go Bolts!

46
by Todd S. (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 5:58pm

#38 No, it's a reference to an episode of The Simpsons. Link in my name. (Search on "tiger" to see the actual scene.)

47
by Vincent Verhei :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 6:01pm

Hey everyone. Just a reminder to please stick your links in the URI field, not in the body of your post. Long links can wreak havoc with the layout. If you want to post multiple links, go ahead and make multiple posts. Thanks.

48
by Bob Coluccio (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 6:29pm

NE wins BECAUSE of the foolish talking by opponents.

Football is not 100% emotion, but emotion is a component, probably moreso than in other sports. All things being equal, effort and desire can make a difference. Not saying that is NE's difference, but I think there's more of a correlation than with some random guy taking a dump.

49
by Aaron (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 6:30pm

If the Steelers do manage to beat the Patriots, I hope Purds spends the rest of his life drinking exlax to reclaim the magic.

50
by NewsToTom (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 7:08pm

Re #42
Fumbling rates have come up in the "Which RB deserves to make the Hall of Fame" discussions around here, though.

While undoubtedly of some relevance in evaluating an RB, personally, I worry about overstating it. The difference between every 60 carries and every 90 carries seems like a lot, but it's an extra 2 per year if the RB gets 360 carries (average). It's also vulnerable to being really skewed by a single bad game. Yeah, Parker fumbled the ball a lot Sunday, but (a) conditions were bad and (b) it was one game.

51
by Papa Narb (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 7:27pm

Re: #26 and 34

Seems like he used to attribute it to sleeves, but as you both correctly pointed out, it was Coughlin teaching him to cradle the ball properly.

Click my name for NYT article linking it to that.

52
by JMM (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 7:58pm

I saw a piece (by NFL films??) on how Coughlin coached Barber on how to carry the ball. He was quite specific. Keep the ball in contact with 4 body points: hand, forearm, bicep and chest.

53
by Purds (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 8:05pm

Aaron:

Can you hook me up with bulk exlax from like Costcos, or Sam's Club?

54
by DangerGnat (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 9:04pm

#3 needs a name change - how about "Steelerjoe"

55
by Alex (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 9:54pm

I pulled some stats, and quickly calculated how many rushing attempts/fumble some RB’s had. This is what I got:

Did you check to see whether those were only fumbles on running plays? Because fumbles can happen after receptions, too. That might make RBs that catch a lot of passes look worse than they are in your list.

56
by starzero (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 10:34pm

call me crazy, but i miss raiderjoe. somehow i thought the first jamarcus sighting of the year might bring him out of his cave, but i guess not. what are the chances of jam making that team good again?

57
by Paul (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 10:41pm

As a fellow Steeler fan, if you plan works, instead of exlax, I recommend Taco Bell. It's effects are almost instantaneous.

58
by patriotsgirl (not verified) :: Thu, 12/06/2007 - 11:32pm

53 - Naw, it's just cd6. Is a single post enough to trigger the FOMBC? Probably not, too bad...

Although he may have a point - per Mr. Smith, the Stillers have swagger. The outcome's settled!

55 - Raiderjoe's been posting in a few random recent XP's, in case you were worried he'd gone away.

59
by boots (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 2:21am

re: #42

You didn't account for receptions (or returns). Fumbles after the catch count too.

And you didn't mention the underrated Brian Westbrook. Who doesn't fumble much either.

60
by cd6 via blackberry, from india (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 3:55am

I'd just like to say that FO is not very blackberry friendly. Of course, neither is India, as I can't makw phone calls for some reason.

That said, I am stopping by to point out that Peter King also has predicted a steelers victory. Football genius peter king.

The real question is, how soon after the steelers' victory will stenson stop printing those atrocious tom brady cologne ads? Answer: not soon enough.

61
by Chad Gerson (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 8:17am

Quote I heard while watching Colts-Jags:

Phil Simms said, "I am like 0-for-the-season on my theories."

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by DrObviousSo (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 11:58am

Nope, like I said, quick and dirty. I didn't take out fumbles that happen on passing plays, or include catches in the number of attempts. I was just looking for ball park figures.

Also, Westbrook may be underrated, but not by me. I just happened to not include him.

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by slo-mo-joe (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 1:16pm

cd6:
the Steelers have definitely been playing better than the Pats in the past couple of weeks (well, one week really, since the Miami game couldn't really say much of anything and the Pats had a decent game against Philly), but on Sunday not only they will be playing on the road, where they are 2-3, but they'll also have to face the ironclad, clockwork regularity of Purds's colon. It's going to be an uphill battle for sure.

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by Cyrus (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 2:22pm

You guys are a riot, I like all the quotes and all the commentary. Nothing to add, however.

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by MRH (not verified) :: Fri, 12/07/2007 - 3:50pm

Last year’s fumble rate for RBs was 1.4% (about one every 71 touches). This includes fumbles on rushing attempts and receptions divded by total rushing attempts and receptions

Parker last year fumbled on 1.9% of his touches (6 rushing fumbles plus one reception fumble divided by 337 rushes and 31 rec), about once every 52 touches.

Only five rbs with 200+ touches fumbled at a higher rate: Betts (2.0%, nice call, Joe T in #41)Shaun Alexander (2.3%), Tatum Bell (1.95%), Kevin Jones (2.1%), and Reuben Droughns (2.0%).

Top 5 non-fumbling rbs (200+ touches) in 2006: Tomlinson (0.49%), Dunn (0.32%), Julius Jones (0.36%), Thomas Jones (0.60%), and Westbrook (0.63%). Larry Johnson was #6 and Tiki Barber was #7.

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by pearl jam (not verified) :: Sat, 12/08/2007 - 12:24am

Parker tends to get his fumbles in bunches, and then go on streaks where he doesn't fumble at all. Last year he had a 5 game streak (95 touches) and a 4 game streak (85 touches) with no fumbles. Those streaks would be only slightly above average, but this season, before the Cincinatti game, he was on a 7 game streak with 172 touches without a fumble. (All numbers exclude the touches in games with a fumble that would actually have been tacked on at the beginning or end of his streak.)