This week's DVOA commentary is all about worsts. Come find out where Washington stands among the worst special teams in DVOA history, whether San Diego has the biggest gap between offense and defense, and whether Baltimore or Jacksonville has the worst running game we've ever tracked.
17 Jan 2008
compiled by Ben Riley
"You guys can point the finger at him and you can talk about the vacation, but it's really unfair."
-- Terrell Owens, who began to cry when discussing the media's treatment of Tony Romo after the Cowboys lost to the Giants on Sunday
"It's really unfair. That's my quarterback. My teammate. If you guys do that, it's unfair. We lost as a team."
-- Owens, still crying
"Because it's unfair. I've been through it. I know what it's like to give."
-- Owens, when asked why he was crying for Romo (Dallas-Fort Worth Star-Telegram)
"I have never known anyone to have more pride in their home state and their upbringing in it than Jessica Simpson has in Texas."
-- Jessica Simpson's former boyfriend John Mayer, writing on his blog in a posting titled "Don't Ex with Texas"
"I don't really follow sports, but I have played some of my biggest and best concerts in your state, and having witnessed how dynamic the spirit there is, I'm betting emotions are running high right about now."
"All witty barbs, blogs, and fashion policing aside, that girl loves Texas more than you know. It's one of her most defining traits as a person. So please don't try and take that away from her."
"'Douchebag' was on the vinegary tips of everyone's tongues this year. Trouble is, I'm not really clear on what it means, and I don't know that anyone does. I know that I get called one."
-- Mayer, from an earlier posting on his blog. Worth reading, folks. (JohnMayer.com)
"I hadn't planned for this. I have no itinerary, no plans. I'd cleared my schedule for the next few weeks.''
-- Colts linebacker Gary Brackett, reacting to the Colts loss to the Chargers on Sunday
"Maybe I'll go to Cabo. Maybe run into Romo and Jessica Simpson down there.''
-- Brackett (Indianapolis Star)
"I just want to tell you one thing. When Brett Favre retires, I will cry. In fact, the day he retires I will call in sick. I won't be able to work."
-- Robert Ruprecht, 39-year-old optometrist from LaCrosse, Wisconsin, discussing the darkest day he can imagine. And he is far from finished.
"You don't understand ... This guy Favre has brought us so much joy. He is the greatest Packer ever. To us, he's Michael Jordan. I am totally serious."
"This is going to sound weird."
-- Ruprecht. It is.
"I dream about this guy."
"I dream that I'm going shopping with him."
"I'm just saying, we worship Favre."
-- Ruprecht (Sports Illustrated)
"I was sitting in the office and he lunged at me numerous times in an effort to do grave bodily harm."
-- From an affidavit filed by Wanda Jackson, who was seeking an arrest warrant against Adam "Pac-Man" Jones. Before withdrawing her complaint, Jackson alleged that Jones punched her while she was seated in an office located inside the "Body Tap Strip Club" in Atlanta.
"Veronica Jones, an owner [of the Body Tap Strip Club], went into the hall to deal with a member of his entourage. I followed to gawk."
-- From Ms. Jackson's affidavit
"He was in the hall, surprisingly reached over or around a security guard and sucker punched me in my left eye."
"As we have said throughout his suspension, we will not comment on Adam Jones until he is reinstated by the commissioner."
-- Official statement from the Tennessee Titans (ESPN.com)
"I think we're perceived as a trash-talking team, and I hate that."
-- Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson, when asked about the sideline antics of Chargers quarterback Philip Rivers
"We're going to let Philip be Philip."
"[Rivers] doesn't need to be turning around talking to some guy that has had 12 beers in the stands. He doesn't need to do that."
-- Chargers head coach Norv Turner (North County Times)
"It's just 'Why?'"
-- Former Titans offensive coordinator Norm Chow, reacting to the surprising news that he had been fired by Titans head coach Jeff Fisher
"I always felt like I coached the right way and if I wasn't, then someone would tell me. Then all of a sudden this comes out of the blue. Three years of giving everything I had and it took him three minutes."
"Obviously Jeff didn't think that I could. I thought I was. That's the thing. I don't know ... but it's going to take some patience."
-- Chow, when asked if his firing might be related to the progression (or lack thereof) of Titans quarterback Vince Young
"He sensed some frustrations on my part with Vince. So maybe it was Vince? I don't know. I am not too concerned with finding out why. It doesn't matter.''
"I was shocked and didn't expect the news that I got today about Coach Chow. I have grown closer and closer to him since coming to the Titans. He was a big part in the development in my first two years and I appreciate all he has done for me. I look forward to working with whoever Coach Fisher hires.''
-- Vince Young (The Tennessean)
"It's not an issue. He's our head coach."
-- Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, providing some job reassurances to Cowboys head coach Wade Phillips. Remember this quote if/when Jones fires Phillips in a few days. (Dallas Morning-News)
"I didn't like sitting outside waiting to get into my car for an hour, but we definitely felt the support."
-- Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman, describing his reaction to being greeted by 8,000 Chargers fans at Chargers Park late Sunday night after the Chargers beat the Colts (North County Times)
"It happened. That sucks. Gotta move on."
-- Packers running back Ryan Grant, who fumbled twice in the first four minutes of the Seahawks-Packers game before he decided to run over, around and through the Seahawks for the rest of the afternoon. (Sports Illustrated)
"I've always wanted to buy a bookstore. You know, sell some of those muffins and a little coffee. I don't care if we make any money. I don't want to lose a lot of money, but we could visit with people and get books."
-- Seahawks head coach Mike Holmgren, sounding very much like he will soon be Seattle's former head coach (Seattle Post-Intelligencer)
"Talupu and Julius Peterson."
-- Deion Sanders on NFL Gameday, blaming (or, attempting to blame) Seattle's Pro Bowl linebackers Lofa Tatupu and Julian Peterson for the Seahawks' poor showing against Green Bay
Thanks to Bob M. for continuing to submit quotes -- don't stop now people! You can still send them to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com.
63 comments, Last at 21 Jan 2008, 5:22pm by Herm?