Writers of Pro Football Prospectus 2008

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» Impact of the NFL's Kickoff Rule Change

After three NFL seasons of kicking off from the 35-yard line, what has been the impact on touchbacks, returns, field position, scoring and injuries? Also, is this rule responsible for a record number of big comebacks?

02 Jan 2009

The Week In Quotes: January 2, 2008

compiled by Mark Zajack

MISSED IT BY THAAAT MUCH

"If we could have won just six of those games."

-Chiefs cornerback Patrick Surtain, on entering Week 17 with only five fewer victories than eventual division winner San Diego. (Kansas City Star)

COULD YOU CUT MY HAIR LIKE THE DUDE FROM DR. QUINN?

"They have bad teeth."

-Chargers defensive end Jacques Cesaire, on why he dislikes the Broncos.

"They have bad hair. They don't know how to cook."

-Cesaire.

"What else don't I like about them? They watch 'Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.' Who does that? Who watches 'Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman?' That's what I want to know. I heard the Denver Broncos watch it. I'm just sayin'."

-Cesaire.

"My biggest complaint with him is that he looks like Ringo Starr, you know? I'm just not feeling his haircut."

-Cesaire, on his feelings regarding Broncos quarterback Jay Cutler.

"Supercuts."

-Cesaire, when asked what he would say to Cutler should he sack him Sunday. (San Diego Union-Tribune)

ZORNADO OF COMEDY

"Well, being better on offense."

-Redskins head coach Jim Zorn, answering a question regarding how the Redskins could score more points next year.

"By, uh, making our drives get across the goal line."

-Zorn, when asked to elaborate. (Washington Post)

TELEPATHICALLY DECODING AN OSCAR ACCEPTANCE SPEECH

"This is mine, I totally deserve it, and if it wasn't for me, I wouldn't have this."

-Redskins cornerback Fred Smoot, accepting the trophy for winning Chris Cooley's fantasy league. (Cooley Zone)

MEA CULPA SARCASTICA

"Every long touchdown we gave up this season, it was my fault. Every time a receiver caught a pass for a touchdown, it was my fault too. In Atlanta, when the guy caught that pass that allowed them to kick the field goal, that was my fault."

-Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher, responding to media criticism of his play. (Chicago Tribune)

AND NOW FOR AN UNDER-REPORTED STORY

"There was a lot of resentment in the room about [Favre]."

-Anonymous Jets player, regarding the preferential treatment given to #4.

"Guys would be getting called out for missed assignments or blown coverages, and Brett would have three picks and no one would say a word."

-Same anonymous Jets player. (ESPN.com)

"The reality is, you throw interceptions, I'm (ticked) off, I don't like it. You know what I'm saying? I don't like it, I know everybody else on the team doesn't like it."

-Jets running back Thomas Jones, talking about Favre on a HOT 97 FM radio show.

"If somebody is not playing well, they need to come out of the game," Jones replied. "You're jeopardizing the whole team because you're having a bad day. To me, that's not fair to everybody else. You're not the only one on the team."

-Jones. (New York Daily News)

AARON, LET'S ADD TEAM MUSTACHIOUSNESS TO THE DVOA FORMULA THIS OFFSEASON

"We might have an edge; our heads might be a little lighter."

-Redskins wide receiver Antwaan Randle El, upon hearing that most of the 49ers had grown mustaches in advance of Sunday's game.

"Fred Smoot. Because it's so thin, you need a microscope to see it. He does it on purpose. It's probably like 1/10 of a millimeter in diameter, but it covers his lip. He's got a big mouth, so it's kind of long."

-Redskins linebacker Khary Campbell, on which teammate has the best mustache.

"If they can grow those [bleeps] in a week, they some bad guys."

-Redskins cornerback Fred Smoot, on the Niners mustache plan.

"He would say that, because I talk about his mustache all the time. Khary has the type of mustache, if he cut it down, it'll grow out of hand... because he's half-Jamaican. You know what I'm saying, he's a hairy person. Why you think they call him Mustachious?"

-Smoot, upon being told that Campbell had nominated him for best 'stache.

"He thinks any mustaches are big if they're not edged up as razor-thin as his. See, he shaves and then draws his on with a pencil. He must."

-Campbell, referring to Smoot's 'stache style.

"It doesn't matter, I'm gonna jam his mustache to the ground."

-Smoot, on whether he'd be intimidated by a receiver with lip fur.

"I would say no, it didn't make me a better football player, but I looked a lot cooler. I mean, I kind of felt like Magnum P.I, to be honest with you."

-Redskins tight end Todd Yoder, on the sporting a mustache last season. (Washington Post)

Posted by: Mark Zajack on 02 Jan 2009

20 comments, Last at 03 Jan 2009, 4:20pm by touchdown al

Comments

1
by andrew :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 9:07am

Where do we start the irrational Mustache vs Neck Beard thread?

12
by MCS :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 2:59pm

Here is a blog post about the many facial stylings of Aaron Rodgers.

2
by Harris :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 9:58am

Cesaire had a great individual performance, but the Redskins might be the funniest team in the league, top to bottom. Snyder might not be able to evaluate football talent, but the man recognizes the funny.

"A little celery is always nice after a good pee."

3
by andrew :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 10:01am

Its probably all part of some master plan of his. He'll probably have them put on a preseason talent show and charge top dollar for it, film it and sell the DVDs...

4
by Danish Denver-Fan :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 10:04am

I wouldn't crown them just yet. You have to adjust for opponent. Everyone can go crazy in week 17 against the 49'ers + SF was suffering from upper-lip-bush across the locker.

6
by JasonK :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 10:30am

They're getting a big assist from the staff at the Washington Post in that area. A good portion of the TWIQ-worthy stuff has come to us via either Dan Steinberg or Jason LaCanfora asking just the right kind of questions. (The remainder of it is Greg Blache. Good god, that man is a riot.)

15
by Boesy (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 5:42pm

Are you channeling your inner Ming-Ming? And if so, why?

5
by Jetspete (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 10:22am

I like how Jones and Kerry Rhodes are calling out Favre. The guy is a proven winner that came to your loser organization. Now it turns out he was playing with a torn bicep. He mustve been in more pain than we could realize. Don't blame him, blame the coaches and trainers for not realizing he was injured.

Mark, could you do me a favor and go back to week 12 and get all the quotes from anonymous Jet sources bashing Favre? Wait, there were none? Ha, its funny what losing does for an NFL player's perspective!

7
by The Blow Leprechaun (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 11:07am

Doesn't Favre have a responsibility to speak up and say, "Hey, I think something's wrong here, check it out?"

More likely, he wants to keep that iron man streak alive, and covered up the injury. If so, it's entirely his fault.

13
by Tundrapaddy (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 3:08pm

No, actually they should blame Favre. Not only did he (apparently) try to hide the injury, but he also (reportedly) showed abysmal study habits, and wouldn't listen to the coaching.

Basically, Mangini got canned because of the boorish performance by a past-his-prime primadonna player that Mangini wasn't even pressing to get in the first place.

But you're in luck, Jetspete - now YOU get to go through the endless 'to retire or no?' offseason saga!

8
by Xeynon (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 11:07am

I like how Jones and Kerry Rhodes are calling out Favre. The guy is a proven winner that came to your loser organization. Now it turns out he was playing with a torn bicep. He mustve been in more pain than we could realize. Don't blame him, blame the coaches and trainers for not realizing he was injured.

How could they dare criticize Favre, when he was just having fun out there, and playing like a kid on a sandlot?

Seriously, though:

Jets in 2006 with a healthy Chad Pennington: 10-6.
Jets in 2007, with a noodle-armed Pennington/Kellen Clemens splitting starts: 4-12.
Jets in 2008 with Favre, injured or not: 9-7.

I don't see how Favre turned the Jets around, so much as having any reasonably competent, reasonably healthy veteran quarterback would have helped them get back to roughly the level they were at with Pennington in 2006. And injured or not, Favre played pretty badly down the stretch, and DID commit a lot of dumb turnovers. If he in fact received superstar treatment as is alleged, I can see how the other guys on the team would resent that.

18
by thegunslinger (not verified) :: Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:04pm

And, you forgot the fact that the Jets played 8 games against the putrid AFC West and NFC West. Next year, they face the AFC South and NFC South, who won 78 games vs the 45 won by Western Division teams. With nothing else but a different schedule, the Jets should be expected (conservatively) to lose 2 more games than this year.

I think Mark Chmura said it best about Favre..."It's all about him."

20
by touchdown al (not verified) :: Sat, 01/03/2009 - 4:20pm

Don't forget, they lost a good portion of those games.

9
by TTP (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 11:14am

Reporter: Is there a worse feeling than seeing one of your players carted off?

Tomlin: Sure, seeing multiple guys carted off or losing.

10
by TomC :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 12:29pm

"Every long touchdown we gave up this season, it was my fault. Every time a receiver caught a pass for a touchdown, it was my fault too. In Atlanta, when the guy caught that pass that allowed them to kick the field goal, that was my fault."

-Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher, responding to media criticism of his play. (Chicago Tribune)

Guess what, Brian? Whining your way into a new contract when you had 4 years left on your "Bears for life" deal put a great big bullseye on your arthritic ass. Deal with it.

19
by Israel P. - Jerusalem (not verified) :: Sat, 01/03/2009 - 1:06pm

Surely not everything is Uhrlacher's fault. Some is due to global woarming.

11
by Temo :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 1:26pm

I'm sorry, but what did you expect when a player who everyone loves (Chad Pennington) gets booted from the team for another guy 2 weeks into training camp, then goes off and makes the playoffs with a former 1-15 team while the guy you signed becomes a turnover machine in December?

I bet a lot of Jets players feel they could have won more with Pennington this year than Favre, and him coming into 2 weeks into training camp to replace a guy everyone on the team loves isn't going to help.

Listen, I know why the Jets did what they did. Pennington is a good QB, but only when healthy and he hadn't been very healthy. So they went out and got the Iron Man himself (since it's pretty evident that they don't trust Kellen Clemens much), and did Pennington a favor by releasing him rather than having him back up Favre (plus the money Pennington was due didn't help).

It seemed to be a sound plan back then, but then Pennington went on to have one of his healthy seasons while the Iron Man cost his team a playoff spot with an apparent arm injury, so it looks bad in retrospect.

14
by Admore (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 3:23pm

Wow, Jacques Cesaire is awesome. He's actually funny. I can just imagine trying to make "bulletin board material" out of his insults.

"We're gonna kill them, because Jacques Cesaire says we watch Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman! And we totally don't! For this he must die! "

or

"He said our QB looks like Ringo Starr! His career is OVER! Over I tell you! No one says our quarterback looks like Ringo and lives!"

16
by rast (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 5:54pm

Hey Zorn? How about STARTING COLLINS? That might be a good way to score points.

Smoot rocks. Hopefully we see him in the booth when he retires.

17
by Toxic Avenger (not verified) :: Fri, 01/02/2009 - 6:40pm

Favre's motivational speech from Sunday's game is missing as a quote

Something like "If it works out, it works out. If it doesn't, it doesn't" - Brett's leadership 101 ...