compiled by Rory Hickey

GENERIC BRETT FAVRE COMMENT

"Oh really Brett? It's not about revenge? I'm sorry but no one believes that this time around."

-- FOX analyst Terry Bradshaw on Brett Favre's shenanigans (The Huddle)

I THINK FLAG WOULD BE EASIER TO MANAGE

"What's it gonna be next week? Two-hand touch?"

-- Ravens linebacker Terrell Suggs on the roughing the passer penalties against the Ravens (Monday Morning QB)

RAY FAILS TO LIVE UP TO "THE U" STANDARDS OF CONTROVERSIAL COMMENTS

"Without totally going off the wall here, it is embarrassing to the game. [Tom] Brady is good enough to make his own plays, let him make the play. When you have two great teams that are going at it, let them go at it. Both of their touchdown drives had personal fouls that kept drives alive. Did that win or lose the game? No, but it got them 14 points."

-- Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis on the officiating in the Ravens' 27-21 loss to the Patriots (ESPN)

WHAT DOES BRUCE WILLIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?

"It's hard, but you gotta look at it this way: People watch the game to see quarterbacks fling it up and down the field. People watch the game, then everybody gets paid, so there's a lot of 'Kansas City Shuffle' to it. You know: Look right, shuffle left. Lots of things happen behind closed doors to protect those guys, because it's a quarterback-driven league."

-- Ravens defensive end Trevor Pryce on the quarterback-hitting controversy (The Trenches)

THEIR POSTGAME SPREAD WAS BETTER THAN OURS

"We were poor on special teams, we were poor on offense, we were poor on defense, we were outcoached, we were outplayed, their trainers were probably better than ours in the second half ... So credit goes to them."

-- Lions coach Jim Schwartz on his team getting dominated in the second half by the Chicago Bears (ESPN)

CAN JASON GARRETT DO ANYTHING RIGHT?

"I said to myself, 'Probably one of the greatest cornerbacks in history and you choose to throw the ball to his side?' It really didn't make that much sense to me."

-- Broncos linebacker D.J. Williams on the Cowboys decision to throw at Champ Bailey on the game's final two plays (New York Times)

THE COWBOYS DON'T REALLY HAVE THE SUCCESS OF MJ OR TIGER AT THIS POINT, THOUGH, ROY

"It happens, it happens. Michael Jordan scores nine points. Tiger can't come back on the final day. It happens. It happens."

-- Cowboys wide receiver Roy Williams on the Cowboys' final drive coming up short against the Broncos (Killeen Daily Herald)

I'M PRETTY SURE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER HAD YOU KNOCKED THE BALL DOWN

"I couldn't have played that play any better. I could have sworn it was going to be a penalty. He grabbed my jersey and threw me to the side. If that wasn't a hold, I don't know what is. I tried to grab him back. I figured either way, we were both going to be called for holding. But the refs didn't see it."

-- Cowboys defensive back Terence Newman on Brandon Marshall's game-winning 51-yard touchdown catch (Killeen Daily Herald)

IT'S NOT ABOUT YOUR ASTHMA ROY.

"Never in my life have I been hit like that, from Pop Warner through my six years in the league. I'm 5,280 feet above sea level with asthma, so I was obviously hurting."

-- Cowboys wide receiver Roy Williams on the hit that knocked him out of Sunday's game against the Broncos (Denver Post)

WELL THAT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS, ISN'T IT?

"I think the throw probably shouldn't have been made, to be honest. If I was able to see him I wouldn't throw it again."

-- Bills quarterback Trent Edwards on Vontae Davis's interception of his second quarter pass (The Buffalo News)

GOOD THING HE DIDN'T THINK OF THAT EXPRESSION DURING HIS ALTERCATION WITH RANDY HANSON

"Offensively we counted nine dropped balls. We could not run the football and that really disrupted our offense. We are really killing ourselves -- we're shooting ourselves in the foot all over the place. And then special teams was a really poor effort and then coverage returns a couple of bad decisions obviously, so two-thirds of our football team really played poorly today."

-- Raiders coach Tom Cable on his team's play against the Houston Texans (KSBW.com)

CAN WE PUT THE RAIDERS IN THE UFL?

"It was to a point where I felt like guys who walked through those doors that just were there to collect a check and not really interested in putting everything that they had within themselves on to the football field. And that was the frustrating thing for me to see. There were a lot of good young guys in that locker room who really want to do whatever it takes to win, but unfortunately it's not everybody. In order to compete at this level in this game, everybody needs to be on board. Maybe it's because how things have been for a number of years now out there and they just don't see the hope."

-- Free agent quarterback Jeff Garcia, the first player in the history of the NFL to say something negative about the Oakland Raiders (ESPN)

ARE SLACKS REALLY THE MARK OF BEING TOUGH?

"Tom Brady, if you're listening take off the skirt and put on some slacks. Toughen up."

-- NBC analyst Rodney Harrison on Tom Brady attempting to get officials to throw a flag for roughing the passer. For the record, Harrison claims he wasn't serious about the comment (Pro Football Talk)

THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE ENDING TO THE T.O./RODNEY FEUD IS A FIGHT TO THE DEATH

"When it comes down to it, I'm a champion. He'll never have that on his resume. He'll never be a champion. He'll look at his stats and say I was a great football player, but I was never a champion. You always have to stand up and be accountable for your actions. As a football player you have to be accountable. Regardless of whether you had 10 catches or zero catches. I'm not jealous. I'm very happy. I don't need the attention. I don't need anyone catering to my ego. I'm just a guy with my opinion. If you don't want to hear it, go out and play better."

-- NBC analyst Rodney Harrison showing what the difference is between him and Terrell Owens. Or something (Dan Patrick Blog)

THAT'S HOW MOST GOOD DECISIONS ARE MADE

"So I had a couple of beers in me and I start thinking, 'I make enough money. We really need this guy. I'm going to offer some of my own money to try to make this happen.' So the next day, I walk into [GM] Mickey Loomis' office and say, 'Mickey, take $250,000 of my salary, add it onto our offer for Gregg and let's get this thing done right now.' Mickey called [owner] Tom Benson, they discussed it, and they agreed. So we upped the offer."

-- Saints coach Sean Payton on the decision-making process behind the hiring of defensive coordinator Gregg Williams (Monday Morning QB)

IF THE KICKER HAD JUST MADE SEVEN FIELD GOALS WE WOULD HAVE HAD A SHOT. NO EXCUSES.

"We have a small margin for error, and we made some errors."

-- Seahawks coach Jim Mora on why his team lost to the Colts on Sunday (The Courier-Journal)

IF YOU FOLLOW THESE INSTRUCTIONS EXACTLY YOU MIGHT BEAR TO PULL YOU A RAPPER, AN NFL PLAYER ... MAN AT LEAST A DUDE WITH A CAR

"Call me so you know where I am, follow me to see if I'm doing what I say I'm doing, hire a private investigator ... but whatever you do, do not snoop through my e-mail or cell phone!"

-- Patriots wide receiver Wes Welker on dating advice he wish women knew

"She can show that she has an authentic personality and have a good, genuine conversation with me. Also, I love sexy lips. I hate bad breath and bad attitudes."

-- Bears running back Matt Forte on how a woman can guarantee a second date

"I had garlic for lunch."

-- Chiefs quarterback Matt Cassel on something a woman might say that would be a turn off

"A pet peeve of mine is when a woman acts like she's not as hungry as she really is and all she orders is a salad. I'm like, 'Baby, please eat!'"

-- Jets defensive back Kerry Rhodes on a dating pet peeve

"If she said she doesn't like men who play video games, that would be a problem. I'm a video game fanatic!"

-- 49ers linebacker Patrick Willis on something that would be a turnoff (Cosmopolitan)

ANALYSTS ANALYZE. PLAYERS PLAY. THAT IS IT.

"I don't care about analysts. They are analysts. They are going to say what they've got to say. I am here, we are 3-0, and that's all I am focusing on. I don't want to talk about the comment that was made by Tony Siragusa. I don't really care about a Tony Siragusa. Next question."

-- Giants running back Brandon Jacobs on comments made by FOX analyst Tony Siragusa that he was tip-toeing (NY Daily News)

WELL YOU BETTER THINK OF MORE EXCUSES BECAUSE THEY AREN'T GOING TO STOP ASKING

"Being at a loss for words is a good way to put it. We're obviously not playing good football. This is the fourth week, and the last three I used up my excuses for what's going on."

-- Titans linebacker Keith Bulluck searching for a reason why the Titans are currently 0-4 (Fort Mill Times)

I'LL TAKE THINGS SAID BY A SEVEN YEAR OLD FOR $200, ALEX

"Change is not fun."

-- Chiefs coach Todd Haley on the sad state of affairs in Kansas City (AP)

THAT'S JUST NOT A SMART THING TO SLEIGH

"That's just not being aware. You've got to keep your head on a shrivel, as they say."

-- ESPN analyst Craig James after a blind-side tackle caused a fumble during the Penn State-Illinois game (New York Post)

MAYBE HE MEANT IT AS AN IDEA FOR A HALLOWEEN COSTUME?

"[Favre's] an emotional guy. I'm sure he'll be a wave of emotion before the game and then hopefully a cold, kind of a serial killer mentality here when the game starts."

-- Vikings coach Brad Childress on what he hopes Brett Favre's mentality is during his first game against the Packers. ON ESPN!! (MyFoxTwinCities.com)

HEY AARON, THE BILLS WERE 50 PERCENT ON FOURTH DOWNS

"looking for something positive but im not gonna lie, its pretty hard to find somethin good after today"

-- Bills defensive end Aaron Maybin on finding something positive after the Bills' loss to the Dolphins (Twitter)

YEEHAW!

"What can the fans do? They can get drunk and be loud. That's what I would suggest."

-- Saints linebacker Scott Fujita on what fans should do to help the Saints out (The Huddle)

BILL BELICHICK DOESN'T KNOW WHAT A BULL IS BECAUSE ONE HAS NEVER RUN ONTO A FOOTBALL FIELD

"Well, I noticed he was doing some bull riding, bull stomping, or some bulls were stomping him, or whatever it was. We'll have to take a look at that workout and see how he looked doing that."

-- Patriots coach Bill Belichick when asked whether Junior Seau would be joining the team soon, alluding to the video that surfaced of Seau running with bulls (Boston Herald)

WE REALLY NEED TO GO TO THE METRIC SYSTEM

"At 211 degrees, water is just scalding hot. But at 212, it boils. It's the significance of one extra degree. Everything about Drew's preparation is about that extra degree."

-- Saints coach Sean Payton on Drew Brees's preparation for making water boil or something (USA Today)

I THINK LUCKY MCHORSESHOE WOULD DISAGREE

"Brett Favre will go down as the most magical player in the history of the NFL."

-- ESPN analyst and resident magic expert Merril Hoge (The Official Site of Meril Hoge)

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Posted by: Rory Hickey on 06 Oct 2009

60 comments, Last at 15 Oct 2009, 7:16pm by mlc0808