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29 Sep 2009

This Week in Quotes: September 29, 2009

compiled by Rory Hickey

NEXT WEEK: DONKEY KONG

"We not only got the monkey off our back, we got King Kong off our back."

-- Lions owner William Clay Ford on the Lions winning for the first time since December 2007 (Detroit News)

TO BE FAIR, IT IS A REALLY, REALLY BIG PICTURE

"In the big picture things are progressing, we're getting better."

-- Redskins coach Jim Zorn, after losing to the Lions (The Washington Times)

HOW DARE YOU ATTEMPT TO DO YOUR JOB?!? THAT'S NOT HOW THINGS WORK AROUND HERE!

"Rich Gannon is not welcome here. We told CBS we did not want him in our building, we did not want him to be part of our production meeting, and that's where it sits."

-- Raiders executive John Herrera on CBS analyst Rich Gannon not being welcome in the Raiders building

"He seems to be a guy who can't get over the fact that he played the worst Super Bowl game in the history of the game and he wants to blame everybody but himself. I guess it's our fault he threw five interceptions."

-- Herrera (San Francisco Chronicle)

ARE THE OAKLAND RAIDERS A CULT?

"It wasn't no mistake, brother. Next question."

-- Raiders defensive end Richard Seymour on pulling Broncos offensive lineman Ryan Clady's hair

"You asked if it was a mistake and I told you no. Get out of here."

-- Seymour following up his response to reporter Lowell Cohn and asking him to leave (The Press Democrat)

AT THE OAKLAND RAIDERS' COMPLEX, THE YEAR IS 1974

"You wonder if Russell knows something you don't know or simply has no grip on reality."

-- Oakland Tribune writer Jerry McDonald on Raiders' quarterback JaMarcus Russell's cool demeanor after the Raiders' blowout loss (Oakland Tribune)

BILL SIMMONS DISAPPROVES OF THIS STATEMENT

"Everybody on the outside of this locker room doubted us. They're in shock. We're the shocker team. You hear it every time you turn on the TV and somebody's talking about Josh McDaniels and the Denver Broncos. They want to know, 'What's going on out there?'"

-- Broncos defensive lineman Vonnie Holliday on the Broncos' surprising start (Denver Post)

IF THE OFFENSIVE COORDINATOR ALREADY GOT FIRED, THEN THAT LEAVES...

"I can't sit here and tell you that this game can be blamed on any one man. Five first downs, 0-of-9 on third down, 28 yards rushing. If I take Byron Leftwich out of the game, I might as well take everyone else out with him."

-- Buccaneers coach Raheem Morris on the offense's performance on Sunday (PewterReport.com )

BECAUSE THE PUBLIC NEEDS MORE BRETT FAVRE

"I thought maybe I could spring him. Maybe get on SportsCenter, I don't know."

-- Vikings quarterback Brett Favre describing his downfield block on 49ers linebacker Patrick Willis (St. Cloud Times)

HINES WARD: DIRTY, DIRTY BOY

"I'll still hit him. I'll just get fined. There's nothing I can do about it. It's either that or try to hurt somebody. So are you going to fine me, or do you want me to end someone's career? I'd rather take a fine than try to end somebody's career, so I'm not going to change."

-- Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward discussing last year's hit on Bengals linebacker Keith Rivers

"The unfortunate thing is me being labeled that, and then the rule change came out, so it's kind of like me being singled out as the dirty guy that's in the league, a dirty offensive player. A wide receiver being dirty -- I take that as a compliment."

-- Ward (USA Today)

THE WATER'S TEMPERATURE SHARPLY DECLINES IN DECEMBER

"There's not a lot of hot water in there. [Jerry Jones] cut some corners in the bathroom there .... It was lukewarm at best."

-- Giants linebacker Danny Clark on the locker room at the new Cowboys' Stadium (Newsday)

STRONGLY DISLIKE JUST DIDN'T HAVE THE SAME EFFECT

"It makes me hate the Cowboys a little bit more. You can write that I did say hate. I stand by what I said right after the game that it was a bush league play. You move on, that's my plan, to move on."

-- Giants defensive end Justin Tuck on getting tripped by Cowboys offensive lineman Flozell Adams

"Normally, people go to the Pro Bowl for blocking people, not tripping people. So maybe he should keep his feet on the ground. We're not going to get into a war of words here, we are going to let it be what it is, and I'll see Flozell when we play them again."

-- Tuck (The Huddle)

JIM MORA IS JUST TRYING TO SHOW SEAHAWKS FANS HE'S A FAN OF THE ALICE IN CHAINS

"There's no excuses for those. If you're a kicker in the National Football League you should make those kicks -- bottom line. End of story. Period. No excuses. No wind, doesn't matter. You've gotta makes those kicks."

-- Seahawks coach Jim Mora on what the excuse is for kicker Olindo Mare missing two field goals.

"Especially in a game like this, where you're kicking and fighting and scratching your tail off and you miss those kicks, it's not acceptable. Not acceptable. Absolutely not acceptable. We're not going to fight our ass off, and have a field goal kicker go out there and miss two field goals and lose a game. It's not going to happen."

-- Mora (The News Tribune)

IF MIKE SINGLETARY SACRIFICED AN ANIMAL DURNG HALFTIME WOULD ANYBODY REALLY BE SURPRISED?

"I don't want to see you looking at the floor! You didn't steal nothing! You didn't do anything wrong! We will see them again! In the playoffs! Hold your heads up! Don't you look down at the floor for nobody! You have nothing to be looking down at the floor about! Pick your heads up, put your shoulders back and let's rock!"

-- 49ers coach Mike Singletary addressing his team after its last-second loss to the Brett Favre the Vikings (The Huddle)

RODNEY HARRISON VS. TERRELL OWENS ... INDECISION '09!

"I could less about Rodney Harrison! Anybody tht using steroids, yes STEROIDS rodney, is a cheater & cheated the game! ... Is tht Y u used steroids b/c u were worried about ur stats or ws it b/c u were losing it? Lol! U're a loser & a cheater? Got any steroid ... Hey rodney! Send me sum steroids 2 the Bills facility next week!"

-- Bills wide receiver Terrell Owens on NBC analyst Rodney Harrison (The Huddle)

MY LIFE SHOULD BE MADE INTO A FATHEAD

"I think [Michael Griffin] should be embarrassed. Maybe Sanchez's post-rookie player card should have that run over on the end of it. He should be embarrassed. They should make it a Fathead."

-- Jets linebacker Bart Scott on quarterback Mark Sanchez's 14-yard touchdown run (AP)

BESAR AL BEBÉ? NIÑO, POR FAVOR

"This week I have Ike Taylor and William Gay, and I'm looking forward to making them kiss the baby."

-- Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco on his matchup with the Steelers defensive backs (ESPN)

ROGER MURTAUGH WOULD BE PROUD

"I'm getting too old to have to put up with that every week."

-- Bengals quarterback Carson Palmer on the team's heart pounding victory against the Steelers (NFL Nation Blog)

DO RECEIVERS USUALLY COMPLAIN ABOUT THINGS OF THIS NATURE?

"Yeah, it's frustrating. Why is it not? I feel like I'm a playmaker. I feel like I can change the game. I just do what I'm supposed to do. I run my route and hopefully the ball will be there. If not, I move on to the next play then move on to the next one."

-- Cowboys wide receiver Roy Williams on not getting enough passes thrown to him (Fort Worth Star-Telegram)

IF YOU REPLACE "JASON CAMPBELL" AND "REDSKINS" WITH "RODNEY HARRISON" AND "NBC" THE STATEMENT STILL MAKES SENSE

"The one problem in particular is Jason Campbell, the quarterback. I don't know what [the Redskins] see in this guy. To me, he's a backup that's been elevated to starter. He's unpredictable, inconsistent, and he's not a guy that defensive players look at and fear."

-- NBC analyst Rodney Harrison on Redskins quarterback Jason Campbell (The Big Lead)

TIM TEBOW PLAYED RUSSIAN ROULETTE WITH A FULLY LOADED GUN AND WON

"Tebow stopped on a dime and didn't leave any change for the Wildcats."

-- ESPN analyst Mark Jones discussing Florida Gators' quarterback Tim Tebow

"Trying to tackle Tebow is like trying to tackle a moving refrigerator. And the refrigerator is winning."

-- Jones

"Right now, we're in horse country, and they are riding Tim Tebow like Secretariat. Or Seabiscuit. They're all winners."

-- Who? MARK JONES. (Awful Announcing)

WONDERING WHY YOU ARE TWEETING DURING A MEETING

"Wondering why I'm still in this meeting room when the head coach can't even be on time to his on meeting."

-- Texas Tech linebacker Marlon Williams expressing his dissatisfaction at coach Mike Leach not being on time for a meeting (SportsbyBrooks.com)

ROGER GOODELL MUST BE ENTHUSED

"Same old me, Same ol' G. That's not going to change."

-- Bills running back Marshawn Lynch talking about returning from his three-game suspension (NFL Nation Blog)

MAYBE CHAD OCHOCINCO OVERSHADOWED HOW OBNOXIOUS T.J. HOUSHMANDZADEH WAS THIS ENTIRE TIME

"I feel like I'm going to get open every play, every time. But that's not going to be the case. Those guys get paid well. I feel I'm going to win regardless, but I have to be realistic. I feel I'm going to win 95 percent of the time and they can get the other 5."

-- Seahawks wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh on he was going to do on Sunday versus the Bears, a team that opted not to go after him as a free agent (Chicago Tribune)

"He didn't say anything. I think it was 95 to 5 the other way."

-- Bears defensive back Danieal Manning on if Houshmandzadeh during the game

"Of course [the Bears] did because they won. But I was open all game. They just didn't throw me the ball."

-- Houshmandzadeh on who won the trash talking (Chicago Tribune)

SAD? WHIMSY?

"Motherf***er hit my penis"

-- University of Minnesota linebacker Simoni Lawrence after getting hit in the man region during the Golden Gophers' game (Busted Coverage )

Have a quote? Send it to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com.

Posted by: Rory Hickey on 29 Sep 2009

38 comments, Last at 17 Oct 2009, 4:14pm by babajid

Comments

1
by Will Allen (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:41am

I LOVE Singletary's approach to his team. If the 49er personnel department is even mildly competent, 49er fans are going to enjoy the next several years. Even a 9-7 team can be hugely enjoyable to watch, if it is a team which plays hard and physical every Sunday.

24
by TomC :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 3:04pm

After reading Singletary's quote, I got up and ran through my office wall.

38
by babajid (not verified) :: Sat, 10/17/2009 - 4:14pm

ME TOO :D

2
by Temo :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:42am

WRs are special.

3
by DrewTS (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:43am

"I guess it's our fault he threw five interceptions."

Yeah, because it was Gannon that implemented the same offense from the former coach that was now the coach of the team you were playing in that Super Bowl. I'm not saying he's blameless, but he was set up to fail.

4
by dryheat :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:45am

Maybe if the Seahawks had TWO kickers on the roster....

5
by Will Allen (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:47am

Also, as a Minnesota Alumnus, it is exceedingly gratifying to observe Gopher football players not resorting to vulgarity or slang when referring to their anatomy. Ergo, I can only conclude that the term which began the quote was "motherfornicator".

7
by Led :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:00pm

And consistent with Minnesota's academic standards, he misspelled "motherfornicator" as "motherfornicater."

I kid.

11
by Will Allen (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:05pm

You masculine child of an unwed mother!

6
by MilkmanDanimal :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 11:57am

Wait, so Seymour goes to the Raiders, and three weeks later he's already going insane? Maybe it is a cult . . .

8
by Will Allen (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:03pm

Sheesh, this'll make it easier for the Raiders to recruit free agents. Who wouldn't want to play for an organization which is willing to trash their former MVP quarterback who took the team to the Super Bowl?

Does anybody in the front office or coaching staff there have at least a room temperature I.Q. anymore?

10
by MJK :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:04pm

Nothing to add to this except my wholehearted agreement.

20
by MilkmanDanimal :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 1:46pm

Particularly when that Super Bowl is remembered more for Bill Callahan's complete and utter coaching incompetence than Gannon's performance (I didn't know he'd thrown five picks, and, being a Bucs fan, I remember that game really, really well). Callahan not changing up the play calls at all has to be the single worst coaching performance in Super Bowl history (Mike Martz, you are off the hook).

26
by BucNasty :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 3:49pm

That makes one of us. 2 to Dexter Jackson, 2 to Dwight Smith (both for TD's, I think), and 1 to Brooks for a TD to seal it (after which Brooks started crying).

32
by MilkmanDanimal :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 9:16pm

I remember all the picks, but I just wouldn't off the top of my head go "5 INTs for Gannon". If somebody had asked me to count them, it'd have been five (two to Jackson, two to Smith, one to Brooks), but it's not what springs to mind for that game. It's all about Callahan's mind-boggling stupidity in leaving all the play calls exactly the same.

So I guess a better way to phrase it is "I would never have blamed Gannon in any way, because Callahan's idiocy outweighed everything else".

29
by Tundrapaddy (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 7:43pm

Hm - I remember it as 'when the Raiders' starting center went off his meds and the O-line lost cohesion'.

And also for Callahan's level of suckitude. And for not assuming that maybe, just maybe, Gruden might be intimately familiar with both the system and the players whom he coached the year before.

35
by Bright Blue Shorts :: Wed, 09/30/2009 - 3:30pm

Yup those are the key things to remember about that Super Bowl. Throwing two garbage time ints returned for TDs isn't really that important.

I've got a lot of respect for Gannon. He tells it honestly. At his peak he was running one of the best offenses in football, making the reads, making the throws and fully understanding the game. He understands the nuances. For example in the Bronco's game, he pointed out how Russell needs to throw the ball directly to the fullback rather than trying to lead him because those big slow guys aren't natural pass catchers. Those are the subtleties of being a good quarterback (and analyst).

34
by Tri Shanku (not verified) :: Wed, 09/30/2009 - 12:01pm

Depends on whether you are measuring the room temperature in celsius or fahrenheit..

8
by MJK :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:03pm

1). Singletary is awesome. I now live in the Bay Area, and I'm glad that I have a real (albeit flawed) local football team to root for that is not run by a dysfunctional undead lich king. Go Niners!

2). I would feel the same way about the Jets and Rex Ryan if I weren't obligated to hate them as a Patriots fan. However, at least now they're fun to hate!

3). What is it with the Raiders? Randy Moss was a loud-mouthed locker room cancer there, and goes to New England and becomes a soft-spoken, charity-doing, team-oriented pro-bowler. Richard Seymour was a respectable, upright, reasonably-clean-playing Pro-bowler in New England, and goes to the raiders and becomes a dirty, trash-talking loudmouth.

4). Can we really be certain that any tweets are real, after the fake Rodney Harrison tweets that came out last week?

15
by Marver :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:56pm

Richard Seymour hasn't been a reasonably clean player since the AFC Championship two years ago.

33
by t.d. :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 10:55pm

Yeah, it's not like Randy Moss took off plays last year when Brady went down, or is doing so again. No chance. Wouldn't happen.

36
by PatsFan :: Wed, 09/30/2009 - 4:41pm

Don't believe everything Mike "Fake Resume" Freeman tells you...

12
by C (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:20pm

Just to let you guys know, I am Rodney Harrison ... [sic]

Congrats on your celeb reader :)

13
by Westito Burrito (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:33pm

Simoni Lawrence = Quote of the Year.

30
by Tundrapaddy (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 7:46pm

I second that. Early frontrunner by a large margin. The quote is Marion Barry-esque in its poetic brevity.

14
by Herm? (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 12:37pm

I enjoyed the exchange on NBC with Rodney Harrison's rant on Jason Campbell. I think it was partly the timing. It's not typical, but Campbell threw for 300 yards that day. Rodney should have tucked that one into his back pocket for another time.

Then Tony Dungy chimed in and criticized Washington's approach from the top down, saying that Washington doesn't necessarily need to take the best players, they just need consistent players and a bit of continuity.

I expect Harrison to criticize, but public criticism coming from Dungy isn't a regular thing. I think Skins fans would hope Snyder had his ears open during that broadcast.

16
by The Other Ben Johnson (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 1:09pm

Dan Snyder does not have ears.

17
by The Other Ben Johnson (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 1:17pm

Dan Snyder does not have ears.

18
by The Other Ben Johnson (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 1:18pm

Something about this double post makes me very happy.

19
by tunesmith (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 1:45pm

Man, putting Singletary's quote right after Mora's quote is brutal. What a contrast. I'm just starting to become a Seattle fan, but reading that quote is like finding out a new friend just got into a really bad relationship.

If anyone wants to read why some people might be getting excited about Denver, read the transcript of McDaniels' post-Raider presser. He just reeks of competence, it's almost weird.

31
by Tundrapaddy (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 7:52pm

I'm just starting to become a Seattle fan, but reading that quote is like finding out a new friend just got into a really bad relationship.

Actually, as even a part-time 'Hawks fan, I can say that its more like having your new girlfriend of, say, a few months say "Not this week, I've...got a condition that's acting up."

Speaking of which, another quote that's stuck with me since about July (courtesy of Draftsharks):

"Brett Favre has more comebacks than herpes."

21
by BigDerf :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 2:13pm

Simmons actually approves of that Broncos Quote. He picked the Broncos as a No Body Believed In Us Underdog pick this year.

22
by MJK :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 2:28pm

Make's sense. Simmons is an unapologetic Patriots fan, and Patriots fans love McDaniels.

23
by tunesmith (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 2:44pm

I hope that moderates Pats fans' anti-Broncos bias in general (you know, the bias that came from the Broncos owning the Patriots for several years. You know, those years that the Patriots were entitled to their victories over the Broncos? But then the Broncos disrespectfully stole those victories from the Patriots, the rightful owners?)

25
by The Hypno-Toad :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 3:24pm

Simmons mahy approve of it, but this Broncos fan certainly doesn't. Every time I hear someone pull out that card, I want to hit them in the face with a shovel. Add to that the fact that Vonnie Holliday has been on the roster for all of what, 4 weeks? Even if it was ever acceptable to use the "no one believed in us" crap, he wouldn't be entitled to use it. Yay, the Broncos are 3-0, and I gleefully admit that I was completely wrong about their defense, but that doesn't mean that I am going to tolerate this sort of jackassery from my team. Also, anyone who didn't believe in the Broncos before probably hasn't been won over by three wins over teams that went a collective 13-34-1 last year.
Boo to this quote.

28
by tunesmith (not verified) :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 4:28pm

Yeah, luckily McDaniels isn't of the same mind as that guy:

On how to keep the Broncos humble after starting the season 3-0

"Just show them the film. Show them the film. We have got a 50-play cut-up we are going to watch during the squad meeting, and it is not all bows and ribbons."

(from the presser.)

27
by Rory Hickey :: Tue, 09/29/2009 - 3:51pm

I meant that Simmons disapproves of him saying that everyone doubted the Broncos because he did not doubt them.

"You play to win the game" - Herm

37
by AnonymousDolphinFan (not verified) :: Wed, 09/30/2009 - 9:29pm

I believe the best way to keep the Broncos humble after starting 3-0 is to show them the schedule. If they have an ounce of realism in their bodies, they'll realize that they'll be 3-5 at mid year.