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» OFI: Blowouts, Upsets, and Narrow Escapes

The College Football Playoff field narrowed on Saturday. Some teams got upset, some barely escaped an upset, and a few had big record-setting blowouts.

31 Aug 2010

This Week In Quotes: August 31, 2010

compiled by Rory Hickey

JAMES HARRISON'S TRAIN IS ALWAYS ON SCHEDULE

"He was running his mouth and getting in the way of the train. And the train wasn't coming off the track. He was popping off down there the first time they were about to score. So you run your mouth, expect to get something. Everything's between the lines, so he got what he had coming."

-- Steelers linebacker James Harrison on why he seemingly went out of his way to hit Broncos quarterback Kyle Orton when Harrison was returning a fumble during the Steelers-Broncos preseason game (Denver Post)

I WONDER WHAT BURRESS HAD TO DO TO GET NUMBER 09-R-3260 IN PRISON

"I said, 'you know what, why don't we do the same deal that I did with Eli. Except I'm kind of re-doing my outdoor kitchen, so I basically told him if he could pay for it we'd be good."

"I never got paid for it. I asked [Burress] for it. Every time I went to Drew [Rosenhaus] he said, 'That's between you and Plax.' Bottom line, I never got paid. He basically stole my number."

-- Giants punter Jeff Feagles on what happened when former Giant Plaxico Burress wanted Feagles' No. 17 when Burress became a member of the Giants in 2005 (Sports Illustrated)

YOU KNOW THAT JOHN MADDEN DOESN'T ACTUALLY DO THE RATINGS RIGHT?

"They got me terrible on Madden, man. I wanna tell Madden that too. You know what's crazy? When I had my little shoulder problem [in 2008], I was 93, 94 speed on Madden. After my shoulder, I came back at about 88. What's my shoulder got to do with my feet? I know I ain't that slow. Madden trippin' on my speed, you know I'm not an 88. He got Fred [Taylor] and them faster than me. I know they ain't faster than me."

-- Patriots running back Laurence Maroney on his speed rating in Madden '11 (Boston.com)

DO AS I SAY NOT AS I DO

"Whether the camera is on you or not, you ought not to be using certain language."

-- FOX NFL analyst Brian Billick on Jets' coach Rex Ryan using foul language during Hard Knocks. Using foul language is only acceptable if you're Brian Billick (USA Today)

JAMES TONEY IS TOO GROGGY TO UNDERSTAND THIS ANALOGY

"You talking about the tail whipping we just took? Does it shock me we got our tails whipped like that? Yeah, like that, yeah. There was no fight back or anything. It was like an MMA fight. They put us in a submission hold. Pretty much cut off our oxygen slowly until we had to just tap out."

-- Cowboys wide receiver Patrick Crayton on if he was surprised at how the Cowboys played in their 23-7 preseason loss to the Texans (Tulsa World)

HE LEGALLY HAD TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO STYLEZ AFTER A GAMBLING LOSS

"Stylez is my Allen Iverson, and he's not going to change. He's gotten better. He's gotten better the last couple of days and practiced [better] throughout training camp than he has in the past, but he is Allen Iverson."

-- Buccaneers coach Raheem Morris on the practice habits of Stylez G. White (Tampa Tribune)

HE ALSO SEES A LARGE PEPPERONI PIZZA

"I just know what's going to happen. My crystal ball, I'm seeing a Super Bowl trophy in there. Now, I could be wrong, but that's what I see. But every time I go to work, that's what I look at. I'm not embarrassed to say that I believe that will happen. The great thing is we get to prove it soon. That's the beauty of it."

-- Jets coach Rex Ryan on seeing a Super Bowl for the Jets in his crystal ball (Star-Ledger)

HALL WILL ALSO ASK RECEIVERS TO STOP RUNNING ROUTES AT HIM

"I did, I did. She was too tall. If I was 6 feet like [Carlos Rogers], I wouldn't have to do that, but I'm 5-11, so she definitely had to take them heels off for me. She ain't about to make me look bad."

-- Redskins defensive back DeAngelo Hall on making a reporter take off her heels before interviewing him (D.C. Sports Bog)

THEY REALLY DON'T LIKE EACH OTHER

"At some point in time, we're going to play them, and we handle these things on the field. When you're going to be on the field, don't be a crybaby and be Tom Brady, running to the referees and always complaining. Don't be that. We don't do that."

-- Jets nose tackle Kris Jenkins fanning the flames of the Patriots-Jets rivalry (NFL Nation Blog)

MAYBE IT'S TIME FOR A CAREER CHANGE?

"It was all enthusiasm. I was doing it in practice and in preseason camp just messing around, and then I thought, you know, time was right to do it. If I was gonna soar, I might as well do it now 'cause I don't know if I'm gonna get a chance to do it again."

-- Redskins running back Larry Johnson on dunking after scoring a touchdown (D.C. Sports Bog)

A MACADAMIA NUT MIGHT HAVE WORKED BETTER

"We bring the sweet portion to the game. So if you bring one lone chocolate chip, and place it in a single sugar cookie, how much would that chocolate chip stand out? Get my drift?"

-- Rams wide receiver Mardy Gilyard explaining why his nickname for fellow wide receiver Danny Amendola is White Chocolate while the rest of the receiving corps are sugar cookies (Post-Dispatch)

Send a quote to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com. Next week, TWIQ will be moving back to Fridays for the regular season.

Posted by: Rory Hickey on 31 Aug 2010

32 comments, Last at 02 Sep 2010, 10:33am by Bill Heffner

Comments

1
by John (not verified) :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 12:20pm

Slow week.

Rex, I'm pretty confident that a Super Bowl trophy will happen too. Nowhere do you say that the Jets will actually be the ones holding it, so your prediction seems safe. Good prognostication.

2
by Purds :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 12:44pm

As a Colt fan, I find this whole NYJ-Pats hatred a thing of beauty. Watching those games this year is going to be such a win-win situation! How can you lose?

If the Pats smoke the Jets with a few Brady to Moss bombs, you get to see the school-yard bully try to squirm his way out of getting his butt handed to him.

If the Jets hammer Brady in the pocket a few times, with a couple of clean, hard hits on Moss and Welker, you get to see Tommy Boy start yelling at linemen. I can't wait!

7
by Basilicus :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:19pm

Yelling at linemen for no good reason? I guess a little Peyton did rub off on Brady after all this time.

10
by Purds :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:54pm

No, in that case, I want to see Brady yelling at the line for good reason -- like that they suck. And then the guys in the booth will start the whole Mankins thing ... It's going to be wondrous.

9
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:46pm

And no matter what happens, we all get to watch Manning blow it all in the playoffs anyway!

Everyone wins!

11
by Purds :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:56pm

You may be right, but at least there will be something to watch in the regular season (as opposed to watching the Colts, AGAIN, winning the division and resting guys until the playoffs).

16
by Boo-urns (not verified) :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 4:50pm

Don't forget the preseason, where we get to watch Bill Polian and Peyton crying about an obscure rule change!

19
by Joseph :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 5:46pm

Temo, IIRC, you're a Cowboys fan. Pot, meet kettle.

20
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 5:56pm

Jets fan too (sorta, kinda... live in the area and Jets games are the only games I can see live). I was just poking back.

Also, I freely admit my team(s) continuing incompetence. However, it should not be a problem this year, since making the playoffs will be a long shot. Huzzah!

26
by Mr Shush :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 8:11pm

Temo, I'd love to know your take on what's up with the Cowboys offense. Is it, "They've had a crazy long pre-season/camp, they're tireder than other teams," or "Barron and Holland suck, but once Columbo and Kosier come back that hopefully won't be an issue," or is it something more fundamental, like Free not being very good or Davis and/or Gurode exhibiting age-related decline? Or is it not about the OL at all?

I couldn't watch the game at Reliant, so I have no specific observations of my own beyond what strikes me from the numbers, but it seems hard to imagine that pre-season vanillaness is enough to explain a total inability to run (8 on a Texans unit which I hope may be fairly decent but am pretty certain is in no way elite (even against the run, which is its strength). From what I hear, the offense has looked similarly putrid against other pre-season opponents I wasn't much for the FO projections of sharp Cowboy decline before that game, but I do start to wonder now.

28
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 11:30pm

The offense is great at the skill positions. Romo looks fine, Austin is dropping a few passes, but also looks lethal at times. The backs are also great, and while TE isn't as deep as they would have hoped, it's certainly a place of strength still. So that leaves the O-Line.

For sure, the significant portion of the blame for the Houston game can be attributed to injuries. I'm sure when Columbo and Kosier get back, things will get better... but I'm not certain you're going to get a full season out of them anyway-- and definitely them at 100%.

Free didn't do too badly compared to his linemates, but he certainly wasn't a rock. Gurode spent most of the Houston game on his back and has been slumping this off-season for whatever reason. Davis has already admitted that last year was one of his toughest years and that he didn't play well, and he hasn't exactly looked rejuvenated.

Simply put, in order for this offense to not regress in a MAJOR way, you need the line to play better. The good news is that with the exception of Free everyone on the line has at some point played much better. The bad news is that for various reasons (age, injury, random skill decline), absolutely NONE of them are playing well right now. And if the starting 5 can't get on the field and playing well, the depth behind them is non-existent.

3
by Phil :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 12:54pm

I could tell he was going after Orton on purpose. He lowered his head and rammed right into him for no good reason. Note to all QBs: Do not try to tackle James Harrison.

4
by chemical burn :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 1:07pm

But it was a preseason game, so it was very important for Orton to get involved in a dangerous chaotic play like tackling a huge LB returning an interception.

6
by zlionsfan :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 1:46pm

As much as there are things I dislike about Minnesota's QB #4, he does have the what-to-do-on-a-defensive-return thing down pretty well, preseason or regular-season. (At least the last time or two I paid attention when it happened.)

Get out of the way. Yeah, there are probably some regular-season or playoff situations where you'd want to try something, but particularly in preseason, the best thing to do is to get out of the play. Nothing good can happen there.

14
by The Other Ben Johnson (not verified) :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 4:11pm

He also does "find a little guy on the opposing team, hug him in a blocking-like fashion like you're both trying to contribute to the play, tell him jokes when the whistle blows" pretty well. He's just a kid out there.

22
by Podge (not verified) :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 6:31pm

Peyton Manning does this also. Obviously he does it with perfect technique though.

Somewhat bizarre question - is there any way I can find out which QB has the most career tackles (ignoring QBs who played 2 ways)?

23
by tuluse :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 6:51pm

You can try the pro-football-reference player season finder. http://www.pro-football-reference.com/play-index/psl_finder.cgi

However, i just did a search, and it looks like they don't have tackle statistics for QBs prior to 2008. In the last two years Matt Cassel is leading in tackles with 6, while Orton, Cutler and Romo are tied for 2nd with 4 each.

24
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 7:24pm

So find someone who fumbles/throws picks and is willing to tackle and possibly played for a really long time? My money's on Vinny Testeverde.

27
by dbostedo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 8:47pm

Random guess, but Dave Kreig?

18
by tuluse :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 5:22pm

That's one of the things I liked about Orton. He won't back down from anyone. I don't think you can turn that kind of attitude on and off.

5
by drobviousso :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 1:25pm

Somewhere, Greg Lloyd is chuckling slowly.

8
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:41pm

I don't like James Harrison.

12
by Antoine Dodson (not verified) :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 2:59pm

Then, apparently, you don't like football. Or just Pittsburgh.

15
by greybeard :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 4:47pm

Or just James Harrison.

21
by Temo :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 5:57pm

No, no, you don't understand. I think he's a fine football player. I just don't like him as a person. You know when people say "Oh, I HATE that guy", but then are like "well, I hate him as a player, not as a person"?

Yea, I feel the opposite about him.

30
by Boo (not verified) :: Wed, 09/01/2010 - 9:05am

James Harrison is that way too intense guy you sit next to at the bar. He starts talking to you about the game on TV. And after the first two minutes of talking to him, you're wondering if he's gonna end up punching you. Whether it's for disagreeing with him or agreeing with him or just cause it's Wednesday. So you tell him you're gonna take a piss and go stand in the back somewhere else.

Except with Harrison he actually gets paid to hit you. A lot. I feel bad for reporters who have to talk with him. I always wonder if Tomlin sees him coming down the hall and suddenly remembers that he left something in the coach's private bathroom.

31
by Temo :: Wed, 09/01/2010 - 2:59pm

That's perfect.

13
by starzero :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 3:05pm

Ditto.

--
hail damage

17
by mathesond :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 5:08pm

I suspect Jim Brown's letter to Mike Holmgren was too late for this week, but it almost deserves it's own TWIQ thread

25
by bingo762 :: Tue, 08/31/2010 - 7:39pm

Wow! What an angry old man

32
by Bill Heffner (not verified) :: Thu, 09/02/2010 - 10:33am

You do recall that it was Jim Brown wh ignored the salute of Ladanian Tomlinson when LT broke his running record.

29
by rfh1001 :: Wed, 09/01/2010 - 3:38am

1. Macadamia nuts are the only commercially important foodstuff originating from Australasia/Oceania/Whatever that continent is called now.

2. There is a power station in Queensland powered by macadamia nut shells.

Who is this Jerome Harrison guy?