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» Scramble for the Ball vs. DYAR Fantasy Football

Mike and Tom finally get around to a candid discussion about the oft-requested and never-implemented DYAR fantasy football league.

02 Dec 2011

The Week In Quotes: December 2, 2011

compiled by Rivers McCown

YEAH, I GUESS YOU WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT THAT'S LIKE

"Those guys, they're talking like they're Super Bowl champions. I'm looking at them like, you guys almost have the same record as us. I guess they came off two [straight] wins, so they feel confident." -- Redskins tight end Fred Davis, on pregame fireworks between the Seahawks and Redskins (Shutdown Corner)

BOLD STRATEGY COTTON, LET'S SEE HOW IT WORKS OUT FOR THEM

"In our situation, if I was doing it fair, I don't know how I could put us in front of (Alabama) right now." -- Oklahoma State head coach Mike Gundy, on who should play in the BCS title game. (The Oklahoman)

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY? CAN'T A MAN WALK DOWN THE STREET WITHOUT BEING OFFERED A JOB?

"You know every quarterback that’s gone down? Pretty much every team has called, They had me on flights ready to come out [saying,] ‘Well, can he rehab here.’ Every last one of them. And I’ve had to say ‘no’ every time. I don’t even know if this is a record of how many quarterbacks have gone down in one season but for me to be sitting out here and not to be able to play? I’ve never not been able to play but there’s nothing I can do. I’m good right now at getting in and out of chairs and helping my wife around the house but running around, throwing, and getting hit? I’m just not in that position at this time." -- Former Jaguars quarterback David Garrard, on life during rehab (Pro Football Talk)

THIS WAS A COPACETIC WAY OF DODGING THAT QUESTION

"It would be without propriety for me to make a determination about the history of college football." -- LSU head coach Les Miles, on his team's place in history (Press-Register)

NO FESTIVUS MAXIMUS IN JACKSONVILLE

"They’re looking for young and cheap, and I’m neither." -- Former Ravens coach Brian Billick, on the chances that he'll be the next Jaguars head coach (NFL.com)

SOULJA BOY WOULD BE HAPPY TO TELL YOU, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO SIGN THIS WAIVER SAYING THAT YOU WON'T TAKE HIS HAT

"What's the term today, 'swag'? I don't even know what that means. You have to be confident in your abilities." -- Michigan coach Brady Hoke, on the line between cocky and confident (AnnArbor.com)

CHANNELING HIS INNER IVERSON

"I'm not answering none of that type of question. If you're going to ask something about the game, do that. You're asking questions that don't even mean nothing. Next question." -- Eagles wideout DeSean Jackson, on why he warmed up with the defensive linemen (NFL.com)

THE REPORTER WHO BROKE THIS STORY? JEFF PEARLMAN

"I was posting what I thought was an anonymous opinion." -- Texas A&M senior associate athletic director Jeff Toole, on crude message board comments he made about R. Bowen Loftin (San Antonio Express-News)

SHUT UP, THAT'S WHY!

"I asked Dirk (Koetter) do you want a timeout there and he said no. That’s why." -- Former Jaguars head coach Jack Del Rio, on why he didn't call a timeout before his team's final offensive play of the game (Twitter)

UP CHUCK BREAK LUCK

"It would be like not planting a flag on the top of a mountain after all the effort to get there," -- UCLA head coach Rick Neuheisel, on coaching in the Pac-12 Championship game despite being ousted earlier in the week (AP)

THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW, IN FACT

"That’s for another day." -- Outgoing Jaguars owner Wayne Weaver, on the status of Jack Del Rio's employment after Sunday's loss to Houston (The Florida Times-Union)

WITH ALL THE MONEY TEAMS WILL SAVE ON HIGH DRAFT PICKS, THEY CAN AFFORD A LITTLE RANSOM BARGAINING

"Only if I try to kidnap him and hold him in my house until after the draft." -- Stanford head coach David Shaw, on the chances that Andrew Luck comes back next season (Pro Football Talk)

CAN YOU TREAT IT LIKE AN OIL WELL?

"You guys probably know as well as I do, I don’t really make a lot of those decisions. I’m kind of just along for the ride. I hear about them in passing or if I have to possibly write a check or something of that sort. Other than that, whatever she wants to do, I’m on board." -- Bears quarterback Jay Cutler, on getting re-engaged. (Sports Radio Interviews)

WELL, ACTUALLY WE JUST PAID WILL LYLES TO DO IT

"There are lots of parking lots. We scouted the parking lots. If need be, we could go there." -- Oregon head coach Chip Kelly, on possible practice sites for his team since Autzen Stadium was being prepared for the Pac-12 Championship game (The Oregonian)

NEVER GET INTO A LAND WAR IN ASIA, AND NEVER LOOK PAST A TEAM THAT STARTS DAN ORLOVSKY

"You don’t think you can gauge a team based on how a player blocks Dwight Freeney and Robert Mathis? I mean, who else would you gauge it against?" -- Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, answering a question about how much you can take from a game against a lowly opponent (Boston Herald)

THE NORVTASTROPHE HAS MOVED TO STAGE THREE

"We do the dumbest (stuff). I’ve never been on a team that does the dumbest (stuff) all the time." -- Chargers linebacker Shaun Phillips, after the Broncos overcame San Diego in overtime (San Diego Union-Tribune)

THEN AGAIN, NONE OF MY PAST LIVES WERE LIVED AS A FOOTBALL PLAYER

"First time in history I've seen somebody kick an 80-yard punt that was in the air -- not just a good roll where somebody might kick a ball 50 yards and roll a good 30. It seemed like the whole 80 yards were in the air. I thought I was back pretty good. I was about 50, 55 yards deep. And he still boomed it over my head." -- Bears returner Devin Hester, on Shane Lechler's 80-yard punt (Northwestern Herald)

ALL SEEM TO SAY DING DONG M'KAAAY

"Each team must have the opportunity to possess the football ... and score. 'Kay? So if you go down ... you got it?" -- Referee Jeff Triplette, explaining overtime rules incorrectly (Shutdown Corner)

POOR GRAMMAR COULD BAIL HIM OUT HERE -- JUST SAY YOU WERE RECOVERING FROM A NEW INJURY REGGIE, EVERYONE WILL BELIEVE YOU

"Best wishes to former teammate Steve Gleason and a speedy recovery!" -- Dolphins running back Reggie Bush, wishing his former teammate, who has the incurable ALS, a speedy recovery (Deadspin)

If you see a quote that you think should be in the next TWIQ, send it via email to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com or via Twitter to @FO_RiversMcCown

Posted by: Rivers McCown on 02 Dec 2011

13 comments, Last at 05 Dec 2011, 9:05am by Kevin from Philly

Comments

1
by White Rose Duelist :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 12:27pm

There's a really good reason why Jeff Triplette is still an NFL official, right? Can someone tell me what it is?

3
by justanothersteve :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 1:48pm

I thought I wanted to know. Then I decided, that as long as he's been around and still does this stuff I really don't want to know.

6
by Aaron Brooks Go... :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 3:33pm

Goodell is afraid if he fired him, Triplette would hit him in the face with a beanbag.

11
by jonsilver :: Sat, 12/03/2011 - 6:49pm

+1

2
by Dean :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 1:22pm

Uh, wouldn't DeSean be channelling his inner Rosenhaus?

4
by ChicagoRaider :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 2:04pm

And Devin Hester had thought he had seen all of the ways of kicking away from him.

5
by Keasley (not verified) :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 3:03pm

Not one but two Pavement references? (Fight this Generation and In the Mouth of a Desert).

Works for me.

Coincidentally, last time I saw Pavement, Malkmus made an NFL reference. He described the Toronto venue as looking 'like an expansion football field' (or something to that effect)

8
by buzzorhowl (not verified) :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 5:04pm

There's also a Pavement song about a high school football game: "Feed Em To The Lions," from the Watery, Domestic EP.

But yeah, I was equally stoked for the Pavement references. It's nice to read at least one sports website where the writers listen to the same music I do.

7
by andrew :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 4:38pm

Video of the 80 yard lechler punt. It pretty much was 80 yards in the air going by where he was standing when he kicked it.

I guess he can be forgiven for not putting backspin on it :P

9
by brad008 :: Fri, 12/02/2011 - 11:29pm

Why do you allow advertising in comments(see red bull hats above)?

10
by PatsFan :: Sat, 12/03/2011 - 2:48pm

It's called "comment spam", son, and as you can see by it being deleted, it's not exactly allowed. It's the downside of allowing unregistered people to comment.

12
by LionInAZ (not verified) :: Sun, 12/04/2011 - 11:27am

My question is why does Texas A&M even have a "senior associate athletic director".
How many ADs do they have? College athletic departments are getting more and more bloated.

13
by Kevin from Philly :: Mon, 12/05/2011 - 9:05am

Are comments 13 and 14 the English translation of the Arabic robo-comments from last week?