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The Week in Quotes
Football players (and coaches and front-office people) say the darndest things
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14 Oct 2011
The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
compiled by Rivers McCown
I'M SORRY, PHIL FULMER CAME THE CLOSEST WITHOUT GOING OVER -- I BELIEVE HE NOW INHERITS YOUR PROGRAM
"We were down five, right? Up five, I mean. It was 20-13? Up seven?" -- Illnois head coach Ron Zook, trying to come up with the correct score when asked about a game situation (Chicago Sun-Times)
YOU MAY RUN LIKE MAYS, BUT...
"We're playing like [expletive], that's what's going on. We're not playing good. We're not disciplined. We're not into our gaps. We're not physical. I don't know how many yards that kid had. He probably didn't even have 10 carries." -- Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher, after Jahvid Best and the Lions ran them over (ESPN Chicago)
TO WHICH DAVIS REPLIED: "NANNY NANNY BOO BOO, STICK YOUR HEAD IN DOO DOO"
"You and I would have trouble getting along, because I am smarter than you are." -- Penn State coach Joe Paterno, recalling a time when Al Davis offered him a job. (York Daily Record)
DID YOU NOT SEE THE "JUST WIN, BABY" QUOTE?
"You don’t adjust. You just dominate." -- Deceased Raiders owner Al Davis, on how to adjust to life in California (ESPN AFC South Blog)
GOOD, NOT GREAT. NOW CHICKEN, ALASKA? THEY HAVE THE BEST ONES
"They’ve got good wings." -- Jets wide receiver Plaxico Burress, on the location of the AFC East team his team is now trailing by two games. (Yahoo!)
SIMILAR QUOTES ABOUT JUAN CASTILLO WERE NOT FOUND
"It’s not Coach’s fault. Coach can’t go out and hold onto the ball. Coach can’t throw the ball down the field. Can’t go out there and do it, he can only give us what we need. The recipe for victory and that’s what we need." -- Eagles quarterback Michael Vick, on Andy Reid's coaching so far this year. (CSN Philly)
MAYBE YOU CAN FIND YOURSELF A NICE ANTIQUE ROCKING CHAIR TO DIE IN
"They kicked our butts and we kicked our own butts. It was a perfect s--- storm." -- Titans defensive lineman Dave Ball, on the drubbing Tennessee took from Pittsburgh last Sunday (ESPN AFC South blog)
WHAT KIND OF MAN WEARS ARMOUR HOT DOGS?
"If I'm on ur fantasy team don't trade me,I always start slow,I didn't lose my virginity until senior year.I kept trying so stick with me." -- Patriots wide receiver Chad Ochocinco, on his poor performance thus far (Deadspin)
NOW IF I HAD TAKEN REX KWAN-DO, MAYBE
"I’m not that strong. I wish I was strong enough to do that." -- Packers linebacker A.J. Hawk, on a flop that led to an unnecessary roughness penalty for him. (Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel)
VERY SURPRISED THAT SILKY GARRARD DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT ALABASTER'S THEORY: THE BIGGEST MISTAKE YOU CAN MAKE IS TO MARRY ONE OF THEM
"There's been a lot of speculation about me that I don't appreciate. I was going to lay low with the media but I feel I have to protect my name. I just want to make it clear that I'm a football player, I want to be with a team and be with an organization that will be as committed to me as I will be to them." -- Ex-Jaguars quarterback David Garrard, after rumors popped up that he no longer wanted to play football (ESPN)
DON'T GIVE HIM TOO MUCH CREDIT FOR SCHOOL SPIRIT -- WATCHING JOE BAUSERMAN HURTS JUST ABOUT ANYONE
"In a way it hurts me. I know I should be on the field helping them guys for the mistakes that I have made, but I am not perfect. No one is perfect. I never met anyone that has been perfect and I always say when I do meet that person that is perfect I am going to learn from that guy, but until that day I am learning from my mistakes and I am going to take it as a man. Right now it saddens me. I get sad sometimes watching the guys because I know I can be on the field helping them guys, but I can’t think about that right now. I am on the next page and trying to take care of business. I hope all the success for them guys and I pray for them and hope they turn some things around." -- Raiders quarterback Terrelle Pryor, on not being able to play at Ohio State this year (Sports Radio Interviews)
IT DOES SEEM LIKE IT WOULD BE A BIT TOO BENEFICIAL FOR YOUR FRANCHISE FOR IT TO MAKE SENSE TO YOU, YES
"I don't have a thing to say about that," -- Bengals owner Mike Brown, on possibly trading away the "retired" Carson Palmer (NFL.com)
THIS WHOLE THING HAS GOT ME SO LATHERED UP THAT I'M GOING TO SUSPEND STEPHEN GARCIA ... WAIT, WE ALREADY DID THAT?
"I'm not gonna talk when [Morris] is in here. That's my right as a head coach. I don't have to talk to him, and I don't have to talk to him when he's in here. So what we're gonna do, all you TV guys, I'm gonna do a personal interview with you in this other room. And the writers that are still left in here, I'll come back here and talk with you right after that." -- South Carolina head coach Steve Spurrier, selectively eliminating a journalist for a past story he'd written (Dr. Saturday)
HE EVEN DEFEATED THE ASIAN SADAHARU OH IN THE HOMER DERBY
"He was called the white Babe Ruth. He said it felt kind of awkward because he was one of the bigger kids. But he liked everyone there and said everyone was nice to him." -- Ovideo Hagerty baseball coach Jered Goodwin, on Florida quarterback (and former player) Jeff Driskel's time in Japan as a child (The Gainesville Sun)
I TRIED YELLING AT THEM, I TRIED GIVING THEM AN OFFENSE THEY COULDN'T EXECUTE, BUT IT SEEMS THEY ARE HAPPIEST PLAYING ANOTHER SPORT
"We’ve been trying to figure out ways to create togetherness. It’s been great. It’s a way to keep guys hanging around and interacting with each other, and winning helps out." -- Chiefs coach Todd Haley, on a beanbag toss game that was installed in the Kansas City locker room (Kansas City Star)
HE'S STILL GROWING AS A PLAYER. YOU CAN TELL, BECAUSE SWAG HASN'T BECOME SWAGGER YET
"Swag reasons." -- Clemson quarterback Tajh Boyd, on why he didn't wear hip pads during last week's game (Twitter)
THE HUDDLE WAS INVENTED BY EUROPEAN LADIES TO KEEP THEM BUSY WHILE THEIR HUSBANDS DID THE COOKING
"Who even huddles anymore? They play like their coach." -- Missouri defensive end Jacquies Smith, on the Kansas State offense as designed by Bill Snyder. (The Missourian)
LOOK, I'M ALL ABOUT LOYALTY. IN FACT, I FEEL LIKE PART OF WHAT I'M BEING PAID FOR HERE IS MY LOYALTY. BUT IF THERE WERE SOMEWHERE ELSE THAT VALUED LOYALTY MORE HIGHLY, I'M GOING WHEREVER THEY VALUE LOYALTY THE MOST
"By the way I was feeling, I just needed somebody else's opinion. If he'd have said, 'Peyton, you probably can do your thing,' I'd have listened to that. But he is my agent and he does help me out and I think we made the right choice, because I was definitely not healthy enough to play." -- Browns running back Peyton Hillis, on missing a game with strep throat (Cleveland Plain-Dealer)
WE'RE ESPECIALLY EXCITED FOR WHEN PEYTON JOINS THE VIKINGS AND DECIDES HE'S GOING TO HOLD THE NATION HOSTAGE WITH RETIREMENT THREATS EVERY SUMMER
"Guys like that come along so rarely. Even if that means that guy sits for three or four years, you’d certainly think about taking him ... you see what Green Bay did with [Brett] Favre and [Aaron] Rodgers and you’d like to be able to do the same thing." -- Colts owner Jim Irsay, on the potential of the Colts being able to draft Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck (Yahoo!)
If you see a quote that you think should be in the next TWIQ, send it via email to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com or via Twitter to @FO_RiversMcCown
13 comments, Last at 17 Oct 2011, 3:13pm by Hank
Comments
Don't Trade Ochocinco?
I'd be surprised you could find a taker for him. He was outright released in all the leagues I'm in and is still available on the waiver wire...
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
As a pats fan, Ochicinco is an embarrassment to all wide receivers everywhere. He still gets open at an acceptable, if not great rate, but he seems to drop something like 2/3 of the balls thrown at him, and his after-catch procedure is largely "fall down immediately, in case danger is coming."
He could recover from his "slow start" and still be a 6th-receiver-quality player.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Oddly enough, Ochocinco actually has a 64% completion rate and an 18.0% DVOA on 14 targets. From what I've heard and seen of Ochocinco, this doesn't make much sense, but I suppose it's hard not to be at least decent on a per pass basis in the New England offense.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
When he has failed, he has failed spectacularly. For example, on the long TD that he outright dropped that could have helped win the Bills game... All DVOA knows is that he failed to catch a long bomb on 1st and 10. Most long bombs on 1st-and-10 are not caught (it's a low percentage, high reward play), so he doesn't get penalized for it. What DVOA doesn't know is that he had two steps on the defender, Brady put the ball perfectly on his hands in stride, and he dropped it like it was a live ferret with nothing between him and the end zone.
Similarly, he dropped a 3rd-and-long catch earlier in the year that ended a drive. All DVOA knows is that 3rd-and-long is a low percentage play...it doesn't know that he dropped an easily catchable ball.
However, it may be a case of we're overlooking the good, because we're spoiled by Welker, Gronk, and even Branch, and highlighting the bad.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Ocho's running a lazy dig route was the cause of the INT Brady threw in his direction. By rounding off his break he allowed the CB to re-establish inside position and pick off the pass.
DVOA don't know everythang.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
He seems to be settling in somewhat. He's made several good catches at the sidelines the last few weeks, for first downs. Obviously he has been disappointing IRT his contract but I still wouldn't change the offense around, especially once Hernandez is back up to speed and able to plant and cut (he seemed to run mostly streaks last week). I really don't want him taking targets away from Hernandez, Gronk or Welker. If anything Branch is the guy to take targets from, but Branch continues to puzzle me at how effective he is in this system. It's really remarkable.
Lack of development from Edelman and Price is what I find disappointing, but it's hard to get on the field as a 3rd, 4th or 5th wideout with tight ends as good as these.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Ocho seems to be important in the 2 minute offense. Running quick outs for first downs and stopping the clock. That is where he has made the most of his limited contributions. Perhaps, that's the extent of his playbook grasp...
As for the drop against Buffalo, the Pats later scored that touchdown only for the defense to blow it. His drop affected the clock but not the score.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Mike Brown has a good reason for not trading Palmer. True, the team would get some value for him, but it would also demonstrate that players could force their way off the team if they weren't happy. The situation sucks, yeah, but there's no way Brown is going to give anybody reason to believe he's got anything short of absolute final control over the team.
Also, Brown gave Palmer a $100 million deal which Palmer is now repaying by pouting about the team's lack of success. To a guy like Brown, to whom personal loyalty is (I believe) rather important, that has to feel something like a betrayal.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Yeah, that lousy Palmer. Not liking his employer and wanting to go to a different one. How dare he.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Well he DID sign a contract that says he can only play with the Bengals, and the Bengals can cancel at any time.
So he agreed to not go to a different employer even if he didn't like his current one.
But I do understand that the one-sided nature of only teams being able to cancel contracts is frustrating. I.e. why should they be able to cut him at any time, but he can't leave at any time?
The fact that a lot of owners would give in for the good of the team or the player or the league is probably one of the reasons players haven't pushed harder for more guaranteed contracts. (Although there has been a lot of push for bigger guaranteed money.) If every owner behaved like Mike Brown is in this case, I think you'd see the landscape of NFL contracts change a bit.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
I understand all that, which is why Palmer isn't on another team right now. I'm just pointing out the absurdity of Mike Brown feeling betrayed.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
So instead of players "forc[ing] their way off the team if they weren't happy", they'll just refuse to sign long-term contracts with the Bengals.
Re: The Week In Quotes: October 14, 2011
Illnoise indeed.
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