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The Week in Quotes

Football players (and coaches and front-office people) say the darndest things

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27 Jan 2012

The Week In Quotes: January 27, 2012

compiled by Rivers McCown

MENTAL IMAGE: ASKA FROM TOURNAMENT FIGHTERS PLAYING LINEBACKER IN THE SUPER BOWL

"You gotta (expletive) keep your head up and wrap the crap up on a tackle and hit with your (expletive) eyes. You can't go in there and throw your goddamn ass into him. Just make the (expletive) tackle." -- Patriots coach Bill Belichick on the sideline during the AFC Championship game (YouTube)

TECHNICALLY, GOING BACKWARDS IS SOMETHING

"I had one ball. I think they went away from the game plan. ... I feel like if they had went to the game plan and given the playmakers the ball, they would have done something with the ball." -- LSU tight end DeAngelo Peterson, on LSU's BCS title game plan (Press-Register)

GREAT IS GOOD, BUT AMAZING WOULD BE GREAT

"I think we’ve got a nucleus and a foundation of talent on this football team that has a chance to be good. And we’ve got to continue to build a roster to be better than good. Because good is just not good enough. We’ve got to be great." -- Dolphins GM Jeff Ireland, on the tasks ahead of him this offseason (Sun Sentinel)

SPEAK UP NEXT TIME, JOE

"We never discussed the race. To me I was in a race. Joe won more games than Bear Bryant. I came along and won more games than Joe. Joe came along and won more games than me. I was competitive with it. Joe never mentioned it. I don’t even think he cared. Now I know he must have, but he would never say anything." -- Ex-Florida State coach Bobby Bowden, on squaring off with Joe Paterno for the coaching wins crown. (Sports Radio Interviews)

SHOOTING THE SEQUEL BEFORE THE TREATMENT'S EVEN FINISHED

"I'm not in a very good place for healing, let's say that. It's not a real good environment down there right now, to say the least. Everybody's walking around on eggshells. I don't recognize our building right now. There's such complete and total change." -- Colts quarterback Peyton Manning, on the state of the team's practice facility (Indianapolis Star)

"There’s not any sort of bad situation around here for healing or anything like that. That’s not a correct perspective. Like I said, you keep it in house, your family, you talk to each other if you have problems, and he knows that." -- Colts owner Jim Irsay, on Manning (Indianapolis Star)

THERE'S A TIME AND A PLACE FOR EVERYTHING, AND IT'S CALLED COLLEGE

"Its like I need pussy everyday to be satisfied going to school with a whole bunch of guys sucks" -- High school recruit Yuri Wright, who committed to Colorado after some other schools stopped recruiting him due to the contents of his Twitter account (ChatSports.com)

FORLORNLY SHAKE YOUR HEAD AT THINGS THAT AREN'T HAPPENING ON A FOOTBALL FIELD?

"I feel good. Retire to do what?" -- Giants head coach Tom Coughlin, on his post-Super Bowl plans (CBS Sports)

COLE NEVER DID ENOUGH BACKPACKING TO REALLY GET IN TO AUGEN AUF!

"I know [offensive coordinator Chad] Morris likes me because I'm really their only dual-threat guy, so I can come in for certain packages to run since that's the best thing I do, really. Plus Cole doesn't have that oomph right now and Tajh needs that every day ... for someone to push him and keep him working so he gets better." -- Clemson recruit Chad Kelly, on how quickly he will be fighting for playing time behind Tajh Boyd (Dr. Saturday)

OK, YOU'RE ANNOYING ME NOW. YOUR VOICE IS SHRILL. GOODBYE

"Be an analyst, not a douchebag." -- Ravens pass rusher Terrell Suggs, to Skip Bayless (Deadspin)

"I’ve got plenty. One I haven’t used, but I’m saving up if they ever invite me on to First Take: ‘I hope you fall down an elevator shaft onto a burning pile of rusted AIDS needles.’" -- Vikings punter Chris Kluwe, on insults for Bayless (Pioneer Press)

AND YOU WERE LYING WIDE AWAKE IN THE GARDEN, TRYING TO GET OVER YOUR STARDOM

"I've been on that right corner since I've been here. It's like seeing my lady with another guy." -- 49ers cornerback Shawntae Spencer, on losing his starting job to Tarell Brown (Sacramento Bee)

NEVER, EVER, EVER, DO STEROIDS THOUGH KIDS

"Even now knowing the risks I would still take the Toradol shot. And I probably will." -- Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher, on a widely-used painkilling shot that has some dangerous long-term side effects (Pro Football Talk)

GUS MALZAHN'S TACTIC OF SCORING STYLE POINTS IS OVER

"It’s our job as an offense to protect that defense. And at the end of the day, it’s our job to score football points." -- New Auburn offensive coordinator Scott Loeffler, on his job (Sports Grid)

AND IF BALTIMORE DOES NOT WANT TO SEE ME AGAIN, I WOULD UNDERSTAND

"I appreciate all the backing, but listen, you don't have to worry about me jumping off a ledge or driving my car off a cliff." -- Ravens kicker Billy Cundiff, on his state of mind following last week's missed kick (Deadspin)

THEN HE TRADED ME FOR MIKE SIROTKA

"He was actually right there. He was the first person I saw when I got out of the locker room and he was the kind of person that let me know what was coming and first thing he said to me was, ‘Are you tough enough? Are you man enough to bounce back from this?’" -- 49ers receiver Kyle Williams, on his dad, White Sox general manager Kenny Williams, talking to him after Sunday's game (Sports Radio Interviews)

GOTTA GO, MY DAMN WIENER KIDS ARE LISTENING

"Well, I sucked pretty bad today, but our defense saved us." -- Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, on his performance in the AFC Championship game (SportsGrid)

POOR LITTLE GIRLY-MAN, ALONE IN HIS GIRLY-HOUSE!

"Is it just California that everybody just wants to know how you feel? Care about what you thought, what you did, how you felt, how your pinky feels. Is that just a California thing? Back where I come from, nobody really cares." -- 49ers coach Jim Harbaugh, on media questions about how he "feels" (San Francisco Chronicle)

TASTE THE LIGHT, TASTE THE ACTION, TASTE THE FAME

"I wasn't incredibly excited or anything." -- Steelers safety Ryan Clark, on his selection to the Pro Bowl (Sports Radio Interviews)

If you see a quote that you think should be in the next TWIQ, send it via email to quotes-at-footballoutsiders.com or via Twitter to @FO_RiversMcCown

Posted by: Rivers McCown on 27 Jan 2012

34 comments, Last at 30 Jan 2012, 7:20pm by commissionerleaf

Comments

1
by dryheat :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 9:16am

There has to be an award sometime, somewhere, for something to name after Chris Kluwe

2
by Jonadan :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 10:17am

Seems like the sort of thing the Scramble guys might go for. Chris Kluwe Memorial Burn of the Week, or something.

---
"When you absolutely don't know what to do any more, then it's time to panic." - Johann van der Wiel

3
by Aaron Brooks Go... :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 10:39am

The difference between Chris Kluwe and Skip Bayless, is that Kluwe is observant, funny, and contains some smattering of football skill.

8
by MilkmanDanimal :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 11:56am

It needs to feature the word "AWESOME" in some prominent way. As a combination football/gaming geek, his Twitter feed is an endless source of hilarity to me.

23
by NickAKelly (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 9:14pm

Thank you for mentioning the twitter feed (@ChrisWarcraft btw). My sides hurt from laughing. This guy is just random and hysterical.

28
by akn :: Sat, 01/28/2012 - 6:37pm

Not to nitpick Kluwe's comment (because it was awesome), but I would think the whole burning thing would sterilize the AIDS on those dirty needles.

4
by BSR :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 10:47am

How is this list missing

"Yo Soy Fiesta!" - Rob Gronkowski

6
by NotJimmy (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 11:10am

Gronk. He's so crazy...

18
by Rivers McCown :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 5:56pm

Prolly because no one submitted it.

As always, if you have a quote that you want to be in the piece, send it along.

5
by Stats are for losers (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 10:57am

Excellent Simpsons reference.

10
by Mort (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 12:36pm

I was rather excited about The Mountain Goats reference, myself.

7
by Will Allen :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 11:37am

Didn't Bayless start in Dallas? Can somebody who lived there at that time comment whether he ever exhibited any skill, other than for being a loudmouthed ignorant jackass?

20
by tuluse :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 6:48pm

In modern parlance, he's a troll. A damn good troll though.

26
by Whatev :: Sat, 01/28/2012 - 4:03am

He's not that good. Maybe for the sports division, but in freestyle he's not even close to the top.

27
by tuluse :: Sat, 01/28/2012 - 4:09am

You just need to look at 1st and 10 ratings to see his effect.

9
by Camp Bras (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 12:29pm

I just read this comment in the Kluwe article, and I felt compelled to share. High-quality black humor:

"Kent Miller · Top Commenter
I heard that on the flight back to Denver that Cundiff put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger......but it was wide left. xD"

11
by Mike_in_Jersey (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 12:38pm

Here's one I thought was funny.

Steve Weatherford (Giants punter/PK holder), after cameras caught him cursing in celebration:

“I said, ‘Mom, all I said was we’re going to the fffffffffffforty-sixth Super Bowl.’ ” Weatherford joked. “I don’t know if she really believed me.”

12
by MJK :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 12:39pm

Have to say my respect for Suggs went way up for how he handled himself in that Skip Bayless interview.

I think douchebag is too kind a word for Bayless.

13
by MilkmanDanimal :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 1:07pm

Bayless and Cowherd are the sewage drips of ESPN, guys who exist to say stupid things for the sole purpose of creating controversy and making noise.

14
by Dean :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 1:20pm

Isn't that just ESPN?

15
by Alexander :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 1:22pm

Bayless and Cowherd are the only pundits worth listening to on ESPN. Everyone else just gushes compliments.

Random ESPN talking head say, "Dirk is great, Lebron is Great, Tebow is great, Brady is great, Romo is great, Suggs is great, Ray Lewis is great, Brees what a leader, Alex Smith is a revolution at quarterback, Cam Newton is a god, Rpbert Griffen the THIRRRRRRRRRDDDD!!!, I love apples, Duke is impressive, Blake Griffen dunks!, AARON RODGERS!, Eli Manning is elite, Rivers is elite, Cheetos are delicious and healthy, etc."

16
by JonC :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 1:49pm

Howdy, Skipper! How's that brother of yours who is legitimately talented at something?

19
by Purds :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 6:15pm

You got me to listen to the interview, and I agree. Suggs was brilliant. Blunt, but not mean. And, Suggs was right.

17
by The Human Spider :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 5:26pm

And with the Aska reference, Mr. Rivers McCown, you are my new best friend.

21
by akn :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 7:48pm

The whole Toradol thing is overblown. Toradol is essentially IM/IV Advil. Chronic use of Toradol carries similar risk for renal insufficiency and GI ulcers than chronic use of Advil or any other NSAID. If these players were taking a single shot a week before games, that doesn't even qualify as chronic use. If someone develops long term kidney failure from Toradol use, they would have likely developed the same if they were popping 3-4 pills of Advil instead.

We proscribe Toradol to many patients for non-chronic pain, and its a very useful drug. It's a first line painkiller for children. Its not a steroid and its not a narcotic. Any drug can be abused, but I don't see a once a week injection for 4-5 months a year as abuse, unless players are driving their bodies too hard because the pain isn't holding them back. That's a different issue entirely.

22
by tuluse :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 8:17pm

Love your posts akn.

24
by Rich A (not verified) :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 9:18pm

Was interested by the quote regarding good isn't good enough. As I read on slate yesterday, modern football commentary has a real problem with teams and players that are in the middle. Sure it's easy to say this team is dominant or that team is awful and maybe point to a few reasons why but I think it would be far more enlightening, but harder, to show what a middling team could do to improve or prevent further backslide.

We all know the Bills fell apart towards the end of this past season but I don't recall much coverage about how to right the ship, it was mostly of the R Fitz now has his money and has gone down the tubes. What kind of shoddy work is that, it's pure speculation.

As the slate article concludes it brings forward the idea that you don't need to build a team like the Colts where you have stars and scrubs but that to build a really good team you can take a bunch of RFA role players and then fit in moving parts as need be. Though I don't know if Brady, and similarly Rodgers, are products of systems and coaching and reps vs how much is innate; though I sure there is some innate talent and then there is work ethic and then there's the situation.

Let's take Brady for instance, he was a 6th round pick. Sure there was the Mich QB controversy his last year in college but he didn't pop out to scouts or else he wouldn't have been a 6th round pick, even Belichik admits that. So there's Brady's work ethic but look at Cassel, he did decent in the NE system but then goes to a broken team and he looks lost. Or Flynn, is he really good or is it the team around him?

Is Ireland really just pointing a finger in the mirror when he says he has to make a team better than good, because I think the Dolphins in general have some weirdness to their management structure and that has to affect the players. Similarly, why do players like Dillon and Moss fit the Pats but not other teams but then others like Haynesworth get cut in NE but held onto in other situations. There's definitely a difference between NE and Washington and I think the word is accountability. How do owners and coaches not understand this?

25
by Jerry :: Fri, 01/27/2012 - 11:38pm

I think it would be far more enlightening, but harder, to show what a middling team could do to improve or prevent further backslide.

People can, and will, guess at what a given team should do, but unless the team actually does it, there's no way of evaluating the guess. And if you'd said a year ago that the Bengals would make the playoffs by letting Palmer go, then drafting a QB in the second round and starting him, I'd have disagreed, and I'd have had a lot of company.

29
by kevin M (not verified) :: Sun, 01/29/2012 - 4:57am

I thought Kluwe's comment made him sound like a horse's ass. And I don't even like Skip Bayless.

30
by The Hypno-Toad :: Sun, 01/29/2012 - 2:38pm

Yeah. I'm pretty devoted to the cause of exposing Bayless and Cowherd as the useless, smug jackasses they are. But even though it was clearly hyperbole/a joke, I can't get behind that kind of vitriol.

31
by Theo :: Sun, 01/29/2012 - 8:41pm

No Pro Bowl discussion thread?

32
by nat :: Mon, 01/30/2012 - 10:57am

Nope. But the game was entertaining in a surreal way.

Too bad about the drop-kick extra point. Brees earned his chance, but flubbed it.

33
by Jonadan :: Mon, 01/30/2012 - 12:58pm

I think we need a Pro Bowl DVOA column.

---
"When you absolutely don't know what to do any more, then it's time to panic." - Johann van der Wiel

34
by commissionerleaf :: Mon, 01/30/2012 - 7:20pm

Have to be VOA, obviously.

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