Writers of Pro Football Prospectus 2008

06 Apr 2015

The Month In Quotes: March 2015

by Rory Hickey

YOU'VE SURE MONOPOLIZED THE APOSTROPHE GAME

"It's just like the Michael Sam situation -- if he wasn't gay, he would have gone undrafted. Instead, the league drafts him because I think they are trying to monopolize every aspect of the world... the same thing with a female ref. For the league, it's great publicity. The NFL is all about monopolizing every opportunity."

-- Jacksonville Jaguars defensive tackle Sen'Derrick Marks, voicing his opinion on the NFL hiring its first female game official Sarah Thomas. (TMZ)

LORENZEN GETS MORE RUN IN THIS COLUMN THAN IN HIS AVERAGE WORKOUT

"Everybody goes back to the famous picture of Tom Brady when they saw him (when he was a sixth-rounder). By no means is [Winston] going to be Tom Brady, but by no means is he JaMarcus Russell, either. He's not me. He doesn't look that big. He's just a big guy. If I had any advice to give to him, I would say everybody that's talking right now, just block it out unless it's your agent or the Tampa Bay Bucs -- because that's all that matters right now."

"You're not outrunning people. You still got to have your quick feet. You still got to have your mobility, quick arm release, all that. But I don't think being big at the quarterback position is a bad thing. I was talking to some people earlier: Name me the last big quarterback that got hurt. You look around the league, all these skinny guys that can run around -- RG3 -- all these guys are always hurt. The big guys are used to it. We can take the pounding. We can take what it's like to play 16 to 20 games a season."

-- Former NFL quarterback Jared Lorenzen, commenting on potential No. 1 overall pick Jameis Winston's physique on The DA Show. (Eye on Football)

IF HE'S A HUXTABLE THEN THAT MAKES YOU BILL COSBY?

"@DeionSandersJr you're a Huxtable with a million $ trust fund stop the hood stuff! Lololol. Son. #Truth"

-- NFL Hall of Famer Deion Sanders, telling his son, sophomore SMU wide receiver Deion Sanders, Jr. to "stop the hood stuff" after Sanders Jr. tweeted about his preference for donuts in plain white boxes, which is a hood thing apparently. (Twitter)

IS THERE A WORD WEAKER THAN COMPETITION?

"We want competition at every position. [Ryan Fitzpatrick] is going to compete, as well as [Geno Smith] is going to compete, and we hope to add somebody else to compete with them, along with [Matt Simms]."

-- New New York Jets head coach Todd Bowles, saying that the Jets hope to add another quarterback to their mix, presumably during the NFL draft. (ESPN)

ROMO CHOKES AT CUTTING PAY

"DeMarco ended up asking me, 'Why don't you take a pay cut?' I said, 'I will. I would take a pay cut to go do this,' I was like, 'They're going to restructure me.' That's the same thing in some ways, just for the salary cap purposes. He was like, 'OK, now we're back to being friends again.' I would take $5 million less if it meant getting him back. He knew that. It was just funny how he was literally worried about that part of it for a week. I'm like, 'That's not the reason.' I'm like, 'Obviously I'll restructure. I would even take a pay cut.' He was like, 'OK, we can be friends again.' It's amazing what you think about in those moments."

-- Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo, describing a conversation he had with former teammate, Eagles running back DeMarco Murray, in which Murray asked Romo to take a pay cut in order to potentially keep Murray in Dallas. (Dallas Morning News)

SO YOU WANT A REALLY RICH NANNY BASICALLY?

"She cleans, cooks, makes big cash, stays at home, lets me do whatever I want."

-- Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski, describing his ideal wife on Jim Rome on Showtime. (YouTube)

I AGREE, I THINK McFADDEN COUL -- OWWW MY HANDS!

"Yes, he would have liked to have had a more productive career [in Oakland]. But the kinds of skills that got him drafted with the fourth pick in the draft, he still has."

-- Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, praising new Cowboys starting running back Darren McFadden because somebody has to. (Pro Football Talk)

ERIC CROUCH WILL ALWAYS BE BETTER THAN JOSH HEUPEL

"I didn't want to come back."

-- New Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Sam Bradford, on his initial thoughts after tearing his ACL for the second time.

"It was one of those moments where, after all the time and energy and passion that he poured into rehabilitating himself in the first injury, you feel like you're snakebitten. You don't know when, if, or how your body is going to respond and what your next opportunity is. You're really just in a lot of limbo. Sometimes, I think, just having a voice from an outside perspective is something that can be valuable."

-- Former Oklahoma quarterback Josh Heupel, who also served as Bradford's quarterbacks coach while the former St. Louis Rams signal-caller was a Sooner, and now serves as offensive coordinator for Utah State. (Philly.com)

EJ MANUEL IS GOING TO DATE AN ACTRESS?

"Let's not just throw him out after two years. Aaron Rodgers never took a snap for three years. So let's see where [Manuel's] going to be."

-- Buffalo Bills head coach Rex Ryan, assessing quarterback EJ Manuel's career thus far and comparing him to Super Bowl champion quarterback Aaron Rodgers even though the Bills added two quarterbacks already this offseason. (Buffalo News)

WELL, THEY GOT A QB FROM HARVARD, GENIUS

"You can say whatever you want about Darrelle Revis, and I do believe he's the best cornerback in the league. But Darrelle Revis has not thrown a touchdown pass. He's not your quarterback. Yes, he can shut down a No. 1 receiver, but they need a quarterback. The Jets are, all of a sudden, on a high thinking they're going to win a championship. You're not going to win a championship; you're not even going to make the playoffs, because you don't have a quarterback. If you go into the season and you're expecting Geno Smith to improve, it's not going to happen. He might get a little better, but when times get tough, when adversity hits, guess what he's going to do? He's going to fold just like the last couple years. I don't believe in Geno Smith. I think this is a huge mistake. Hopefully in this draft, they try to address this quarterback situation, because if they go into the season with Geno Smith they might win five or six games."

-- Former NFL safety and NBC Sports analyst Rodney Harrison, ripping Jets quarterback Geno Smith and saying the team will win five or six games next season if they do not address the position. (The Score)

HOW SOON WE FORGET CHRIS BORLAND

"Every athlete I think would like to play forever. They never want to acknowledge that they've lost a step or they can't quite do what they did before. Just look at history. Look at all the players. It just happens time and time again. We don't like to acknowledge that we're getting older. None of us do. That's just human nature, and I don't think that's going to change. ... They're used to being a star and they'd like to continue being a star. I don't blame 'em, I understand that."

-- Houston Texans owner Bob McNair, discussing athletes' perceived immortality when discussing the departure of former franchise fixture and new Indianapolis Colts wide receiver Andre Johnson. (NFL Nation Blog)

THE VISION ISN'T CLEAR BECAUSE PHILLY FANS ARE BUSY PELTING RYAN HOWARD

"I think the people in Philadelphia should be very excited about the changes that are coming. Maybe they can't see it -- the vision is not clear to them. Chip knows what he's doing. It's going to be interesting to see."

-- Seattle Seahawks head coach Pete Carroll on the Eagles' offseason moves and giving Eagles head coach/GM Chip Kelly the benefit of the doubt. (CSN Philly)

RODGERS IS AT THE FINAL FOUR WITH OLIVIA MUNN RIGHT NOW. LIKE HE CARES.

"I like the pistol. I think there's a lot of value regardless of the injury to Aaron. I know he likes it. There's a place for it year-round in your offense."

-- Green Bay Packers head coach Mike McCarthy, implying that the Packers will use the pistol formation more often next year. (Milwaukee Journal Sentinel)

I MEAN, HAVE YOU SEEN HIS HIGH SCHOOL HIGHLIGHT VIDEO ON YOUTUBE?

"Reggie can be an every-down back. He's done that in the NFL. He's a running back. He's not a gadget guy in my opinion. I think Reggie Bush is a running back. I'm really excited about Reggie joining the crew."

-- New San Francisco 49ers head coach Joe Tomsula, during the NFC coaches breakfast, stating that new acquisition Reggie Bush is an every-down running back in the NFL. (Eye on Football)

SOUNDS LIKE ADVICE TO SOMEONE COMING OFF A BREAKUP

"[H]e believes in himself so much he won't get a haircut and keeps that belly the way it is. He's darned determined to show the league that 'I'm going to be a head coach and do it my way.' No you're not. It's unfortunate. I'm still trying to get that message across to him."

-- Buffalo Bills head coach Rex Ryan, describing his brother Rob Ryan's misguided determination to get an NFL head coaching job. (Shutdown Corner)

HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU HAVE? OH, ONLY ONE ROUND?

"What team in the NFL has had a quarterback competition and it's worked?"

-- Cincinnati Bengals head coach Marvin Lewis, iterating that he has no plans for a quarterback competition involving incumbent Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton. (NFL.com)

SIX MORE WEEKS OF BANTER

"We obviously have a philosophy. It's kind of like Groundhog Day. I feel like I answer this every year, so I'll try to be creative and answer it differently this year. But it's just the way we operate. We do the evaluations. We just stick to our plan. Our No. 1 priority always has been to sign our own free agents. We go into every offseason -- if we have 10 conversations, nine-and-a-half of them are about our own guys."

-- Green Bay Packers head coach Mike McCarthy, on the Packers' free agent philosophy. (The MMQB)

HAVEN'T YOU SEEN HER?

"I don't trust the lady in GPS. Don't trust her."

-- New York Giants head coach Tom Coughlin, describing an encounter he had with Siri on his iPhone. Coughlin now only sticks to texting. (NJ.com)

DON'T WORRY, NOBODY EVEN KNOWS THE NFL VETERANS' COMBINE EXISTS

"You gotta be ****ing me. 4.91? There you go, there goes my career."

-- Veteran NFL running back Michael Bush, after learning he ran a 4.91 40-yard dash at the NFL's Veteran Combine. (Sporting News)

Posted by: Rory Hickey on 06 Apr 2015

31 comments, Last at 09 Apr 2015, 9:18pm by MC2

Comments

1
by Otis Taylor89 :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 4:31pm

Is there a better nickname for a mediocre player of any sport than, "The Hefty Lefty"?

4
by Theo :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 8:44pm

"Battleship Lorenzen" is one that's in the discussion

11
by Independent George :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 1:19pm

aka, The Pillsbury Throwboy, and J-Load.

Of course, none of that comes close to my all-time favorite nickname: The Round Mound of Rebound.

2
by DP :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 6:25pm

They also called him The Pillsbury Throw Boy.

7
by MilkmanDanimal :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 11:16am

It's just kind of unfair that a player with as insignificant a career as Lorenzen has had three really spectacular nicknames.

8
by tuluse :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 11:31am

In the 21st century all the best nicknames are for insignificant players.

Thinking of Freddie "Fred-Ex" Mitchell.

13
by Independent George :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 1:29pm

Fred-Ex was just too good a nickname for him to wash out like that.

3
by jtr :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 8:40pm

To counter the Hefty Lefty's point a bit, the two premier big QBs in the league, Roethlisberger and Newton, aren't exactly models of health. They haven't had the dreaded season ending knee injuries, but they seem to be good for a few missed starts and a few more at obviously less than 100% every season.

5
by herewegobrownie... :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 9:31pm

The funny thing is that Lorenzen actually didn't look that fat, more just big-boned, when he was playing around 270 (the Giants fined him if was over 268 at weigh-ins, which as a great ESPN article a few months ago noted led to him doing some rather crazy crash-dieting up to those days.)

He has to be pushing 400 now (he also claimed he hadn't stepped on a scale since 2009, which is troubling in the sense that he's avoiding basic medical checkups, which are crucial for someone of his girth.)

6
by TomC :: Mon, 04/06/2015 - 10:03pm

I haven't been checking this site as often as I normally do in the lull between the beginning of free agency and the draft, so maybe the new left-banner-ad sponsor has already been discussed. I would like to think this site is less annoyingly male-aggressive than most football discussion boards, but, um, "for post-menopausal women with a uterus"?

Or maybe that was targeted advertising just for me, and I need to figure out what about my clicking and searching patterns identifies me not only as being old (which I am) and female (which I am not) but also as still possessing a particular internal organ. I'd love to see the algorithm for that.

10
by nuk :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 12:11pm

I got a NASCAR-related ad there. Not quite as off-base as yours, but I'm not exactly their target audience.

12
by Vincent Verhei :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 1:20pm

I'm getting Cat On A Hot Tin Roof at one of Seattle's better theaters. I'll take that.

15
by commissionerleaf :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 5:11pm

Sheba Brand portionized cat food.

You know those stats geeks. Cat people.

17
by Theo :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 9:17am

There are ways to avoid advertisements.

But yeah, some can be crazy.

9
by RickD :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 12:05pm

You're ripping on Rodney Harrison for not acknowledging the brilliance of bringing in Ryan Fitzpatrick?

Really? You're sure that's the ground you want to fight on?

14
by Guest789 :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 2:54pm

Man, I actually feel really bad for Michael Bush coming off that quote. Guy had an underappreciated career.

16
by commissionerleaf :: Tue, 04/07/2015 - 5:18pm

Bush was a good running back who was at his best coming off the bench; he was very nice for an Oakland team that had a lot of very nice second RB's behind McFadden for a while (and a possibly underappreciated O line). He ran hard; like a less frantic and stronger Mark Ingram.

But he's an RB. They don't last, and outside of once-a-generation talents . . . they don't matter much.

I'd pay a guard before I paid an RB; even if I was planning on running the ball a lot by modern standards.

18
by Independent George :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 12:19pm

While I'm broadly supportive of the rookie pay scale from the CBA, it's a pretty awful deal for RBs. If you enter the league at 23 and sign a 4-year deal, you're basically washed up by the time your 2nd contract comes up for negotiation.

19
by duh :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 12:44pm

I think it is a pretty awful deal for all the young players, though it my be especially egregious for RBs.

20
by Independent George :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 1:19pm

I used to think it was ridiculous, but I'm actually leaning towards the Easterbrook plan: eliminate the draft and roster limits entirely, and all college players sign with whomever they want for whatever they can get as UFAs.

21
by TomC :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 1:40pm

Wait, wait, wait, wait: You are advocating a FREE market for the services of professional football players?! That's like...communism or something.

22
by tuluse :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 2:27pm

It wouldn't actually be a free market because teams would be constrained by the salary cap.

I don't agree with it though, it would just make it even harder for terrible teams to acquire talent. How much more money would it take to convince a top QB prospect to go to Jacksonville compared to say the Saints or Chiefs (teams that would be looking to get a top young prospect)?

23
by MilkmanDanimal :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 3:48pm

Yep. The draft is one of the things that makes the NFL successful, the others being shared revenue and a salary cap. Enforced socialism makes everybody think their team is only a year or two from contending. It's part of the appeal of the sport.

24
by TomC :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 6:50pm

I guess I figured the abolition of the salary cap was implicit in this proposal.

And I completely agree that it would destroy the competitive balance of the NFL and make for a worse product. But the case can be made that the competitive balance and quality of product are only being sustained by business and labor practices that violate anti-trust law and are borderline unethical. If you believe that, then there's a choice to be made.

25
by tuluse :: Wed, 04/08/2015 - 8:28pm

Well the NFL has a specific exemption to the anti-trust laws with specific requirements they have to follow. So they're clearly not violating the law. I suppose you could argue no exemptions ever for any reason, but I don't think any country in the world has good enough laws to sustain that.

With regards to ethicality, hard to be too broken up in a fight between millionaires and billionaires as the saying goes. I was going to write more, but this is just going to get into politics to fast.

29
by TomC :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 3:35pm

tuluse: I agree that going any further into this will result in a major rule 1 violation, so we'll just have to argue in our heads.

26
by Noah Arkadia :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 9:52am

I think there's a case to be made it's an interesting proposal, but it definitely involves keeping the salary cap. I mean, sure, the Raiders and Jags might have to pay extra to get a top prospect, but on the positive side, they could get several top prospects (or a bigger rookie class) instead of overpaying for mediocre veteran free agents.

I don't know if it would work, but it would be darn interesting to see. Of course, the reason it will never happen is it would bring veteran salaries down. The NFLPA would never go for something like that unless you had a ceiling on your rookie spending. Which would defeat the whole purpose.

On the other hand, with no ceiling, watch the most desperate teams massively overpay for rookies who'll bust and hamper their cap for years, ala what it used to be like before. No, I think the present system with the reduced rookie salary scale is best.

------
Who, me?

27
by commissionerleaf :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 3:31pm

The draft isn't a bad thing. The rookie salary scale is. The problem with the era prior to the salary scale was that bad teams didn't negotiate with their top picks and paid them too much. That's on the bad teams, not on the system.

The rookie salary scale really should have been challenged, in particular by Andrew Luck, from whom it basically stole $30M plus.

28
by commissionerleaf :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 3:34pm

And yes, running back is a terrible position to play in the NFL if you want to make money. Of course, the minimum salary for an NFL player is still almost half a million dollars a year, so... crocodile tears, y'know?

30
by TomC :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 3:39pm

Oh man, I was all ready to let this go, but now I've got my fist in my mouth stifling all sorts of rule 1 badness. I'll just say that we worship the notion of the free market and allowing people to get as wealthy as they can if they "deserve" it in this country, except in the case of athletes.

31
by MC2 :: Thu, 04/09/2015 - 9:18pm

...we worship the notion of the free market...

This is only true if "free market" is defined as the current system. The problem is that the current system really bears little resemblance to a free market, although its supporters and detractors both like to pretend otherwise.