I admit that I often make disparaging remarks about former players turned television commentators because a lot of the time they don't know what they're talking about (see Sean Salisbury or Chris Collinsworth). Of course guys like Ron Jaworski and Merrill Hoge go a long way in assuaging my concerns, and now I'm adding Troy Aikman to the list.

Our buddy King Kaufman on America's favorite new NFL stat, pass speed. "You'll be happy to know that one of Brett Favre's throws Monday night was equivalent to starting a campfire without matches in four minutes flat, completing the Sunday New York Times crossword in one hour, 37 minutes and 53 seconds, and getting to third base with the prom queen by midnight on the second date. " (requires watching advertisement)

Gregg shockingly doesn't lead his article this week with Mike Vanderjagt's FG miss. Instead, he talks about the Denver offensive line system, gives props to Drew Brees, and makes probably the only reference to Fielding Mellish in the history of NFL commentary. Don't worry, Idiot Kicker gets three reader haikus further down the page.

I am curious to see what people think of ESPN's new weekly Monday Page 2 column analyzing quarterbacks. It features the usual Page 2 folks, and a couple of new ESPN people including Michael "not David" Smith, ex- of the Boston Globe.

Peter King starts his column today in the exact same way I was planning on starting my column tomorrow -- by reminding everyone not to get carried away by the results of Week 1. But he's pretty excited about the Cleveland Browns anyway. From his description of the game, an improved defense was a big part of keeping Jamal Lewis in check. Of course, we all know that 370+ carries in 2003 was also a big part of keeping Jamal Lewis in check... probably for much of this season. Peter also reveals that there will now be a Tuesday version of MMQB.

With Hurricane Ivan heading ashore, the Titans and Dolphins have agreed to move their game to Saturday at 1 p.m., the NFL announced today. Unfortunately, the game will only be televised in the Miami and Tennessee areas by CBS. On the important side, how many of these huge storms are going to hit Florida this year before the whole state just collapses? I know when you live down there you expect to be hit by a hurricane every so often but this is really terrible. Three in a row. I seriously feel for those people.

The astonishing conceit of the latest article from B. Duane Cross is that NFL and CFL statistics are equivalent.

Pat Kirwan has some thoughts on how the new pass interference rules might affect strategy on both sides of the ball this season. He talked to some coaches around the league and based on what he's heard, don't be surprised to see a lot more corner blitzes (since CBs will be marginalized anyway), the return of the Smurfs (diminutive receivers, not Brainy, Papa or Smurfette), and defensive schemes that include doubling the wide receiver at the line of scrimmage (just like in punting situations). Of course, by week five this may all be moot if the officials don't continue to enforce the new rule.

TMQ's All Predictions Wrong or Your Money Back haikus, plus a nice big shoutout to Football Outsiders. Thanks, Gregg!

After watching Oregon State blow an opportunity to upset defending champion LSU because of missed extra points, King Kaufman has a suggestion: abolish kickers (although his verb choice was somewhat harsher than 'abolish'). I know the field was underwater, but how do you miss three extra points in one game? (free registration required -- it's the "Free Pass" option)